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I applied to Uncyclopedia Bassists, and was accepted!!

Eddie Van Halen

There’s a plaque on our wall that says we’ve sold over 65 million albums, and I don’t feel I’ve accomplished anything. I feel like I’m just getting started.
EDDIE VAN HALEN

Accomplishment Album Feeling Myself Start Wall
Major third complications can be overcome by lots of alcohol.
EDDIE VAN HALEN

Alcohol Complication Method
Holdsworth is so damned good that I can’t cop anything. I can’t understand what he’s doing. I’ve got to do this [does two-hand tapping], whereas he’ll do it with one hand.
EDDIE VAN HALEN

Goodness Himself Hold Oneself Understand
We’re musicians. We make music for a living. It’s that simple. Nothing else matters.
EDDIE VAN HALEN

Live Money Music Ourselves Simplicity
Everything comes to me while I’m sitting on the pot.
EDDIE VAN HALEN

Ideas Myself Thinking
I was trying to take the band in a direction that I thought was appropriate, and Roth was trying to take the band in more of a Las Vegas direction. And there he is.
EDDIE VAN HALEN

Band Direction Himself Myself Try
I just consider myself slightly left-of-center. I’m not your average bear. I – what’s the word? I’m not – normal.
EDDIE VAN HALEN

Average Myself Normal Ordinary Word
I took classical piano lessons from the age of five.
EDDIE VAN HALEN

Age Education Instrument Lesson Music Time
It’s always a Catch-22 situation. They hate you if you’re the same, and they hate you if you’re different.
EDDIE VAN HALEN

Different Hate Situation Yourself
It makes me feel kind of weird, but obviously the Man Upstairs gave me something and it touches people, and I’m just so blessed.
EDDIE VAN HALEN

Blessing Feeling Kind Man Myself People Touch Weird
When I was growing up and listening to bands like the Dave Clark Five, the groove was what initially got me going. I really like that funky, heavy groove.
EDDIE VAN HALEN

Growth Listening Myself
I’m writing, and just doing the same thing I always do.
EDDIE VAN HALEN

Myself Passion Writing
I grew up on a lot of early Beatles, DC5, Cream, Clapton, Page, Beck and Hendrix.
EDDIE VAN HALEN

Early Growth Musician Myself
Rock stars come and go. Musicians play until they die.
EDDIE VAN HALEN

Death Musician Rock Stardom
I never took guitar lessons. I took classical piano lessons from the age of six when we lived in Holland.
EDDIE VAN HALEN

Age Guitar Lesson Live Myself
Music is for people. The word ‘pop’ is simply short for popular. It means that people like it. I’m just a normal jerk who happens to make music. As long as my brain and fingers work, I’m cool.
EDDIE VAN HALEN

Fingers Head Music Myself People Simplicity Word
Practice. I used to sit on the edge of my bed with a six-pack of Tuborg. My brother would go out to party and get laid, come home at 3am., and I would still be playing with myself.
EDDIE VAN HALEN

Bed Brother Dedication Music Myself Practice
I’ll be making music ’til the day I die. I’ve done all kinds of stuff, and more is coming.
EDDIE VAN HALEN

Day Death Kind Music Myself
You know, most people, they want to go to Hollywood. They want to be a star. They want to be a rock star. That thought never entered any of our minds, the Van Halen family.
EDDIE VAN HALEN

Hollywood Mindset Ourselves People Thinking
Actually, if I could deliberately sit down and write a pop hit, all my songs would be pop hits! Let’s put it this way. I play what I like to hear. And sometimes I like to hear something poppy, and sometimes I don’t.
EDDIE VAN HALEN

Myself Play Song Way Writing
I never dreamt of being a musician for my livelihood. I certainly never would have wanted to be in the business that I’m in, meaning the fame and the glory, the glitter, the rock star, the famous part.
EDDIE VAN HALEN

Business Dreams Fame Glory Live Music Myself
Music kept me off the streets and out of trouble and gave me something that was mine that no one could take away from me.
EDDIE VAN HALEN

Generosity Music Myself Trouble
I boil the strings so they stretch.
EDDIE VAN HALEN

Myself Stretch
You only have 12 notes. Do what you want with them.
EDDIE VAN HALEN

Music Note Yourself
My son, Wolfgang, plays drums, guitars and bass.
EDDIE VAN HALEN

Drum Guitar Myself Son
Bass is for people who can’t play guitar.
EDDIE VAN HALEN

Guitar People Play
I’m just a guitarist in a kick-ass rock and roll band. What more could I ask for?
EDDIE VAN HALEN

Guitar Instrument Musician Myself

I applied to Uncyclopedia Bassists, and was accepted!!

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I applied to Uncyclopedia Bassists, and was accepted!!

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