While other kids were out playing and doing healthy things, I read an ancient judo book with a neck hold that was fatal to so many people they finally dropped it from judo.
DICK CAVETTThere’s so much comedy on television. Does that cause comedy in the streets?
More Dick Cavett Quotes
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If your parents never had children, chances are neither will you.
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I hate Danny Kaye movies.
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Chris Matthews can’t start any sentence without ‘Let me ask you this… ‘ And I love Chris Matthews! But almost everybody in journalism does it. Who’s stopping you? Just say it!
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To call New York’s traffic at holiday time a nightmare is to understate.
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I think we live in an age of increasing mediocrity.
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It’s lamented that the youth get their news from Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert. It’s lamentable that they get more from them than from the news.
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I have yet to see one of those Comedy Central shows with multiple standup comics that doesn’t include someone the size of the Hindenburg.
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I haven’t ever found any great writing on that wonderful and often unappreciated art form, the insult.
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Why are sex and violence always linked? I’m afraid they’ll blur together in people’s minds – sexandviolence – until we can’t tell them apart. I expect to hear a newscaster say, “The mob became unruly and the police were forced to resort to sex.”
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Radio, which was a much better medium than television will ever be, was easy and pleasant to listen to. Your mind filled automatically with images.
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Its fun for me to go on other folks talk shows. When youve endured the ups and downs and tensions and pitfalls of hosting, being a guest is a piece of angel food.
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I’m not the guy with the enormous comedy nose or the big feet or the bad posture or the whatever; a physical comic has certain things.
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In the main, ghosts are said to be forlorn and generally miserable, if not downright depressed. The jolly ghost is rare.
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My IQ is somewhere between Spiro Agnew’s and Albert Einstein’s.
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It was at a vividly bad time in Norman Mailer’s life that I met him, and a sort of water-treading time in mine. He had stabbed his wife, and I was a copy boy at Time magazine.
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I’m sure I’ve all but lost friends by maintaining that, despite their love for it, I always saw Stanley Kramer’s ‘It’s a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World’ as more of an exercise in anti-comedy than humor.
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Electronic devices dislike me. There is never a day when something isn’t ailing.
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Being the offspring of English teachers is a mixed blessing. When the film star says to you, on the air, ‘It was a perfect script for she and I,’ inside your head you hear, in the sarcastic voice of your late father, ‘Perfect for she, eh? And perfect for I, also?’
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The mob became unruly and the police were forced to resort to sex.
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You have to be on TV a surprisingly long time before you’re stopped on the street. Then, when you are, you get a lot of, ‘Hey, you’re great! What’s your name again?’
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Anything seen on TV is, in a subtle and sinister sense, thereby endorsed.
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Depression – it falls into that small category of things like combat that, if you haven’t been in it, you can say you can imagine it all you like. But it’s truly different.
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Show people tend to treat their finances like their dentistry. They assume the man handling it knows what he is doing.
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Lawyers work hard and, like us, they’re human, many of them.
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I don’t see the future as bright, language-wise. I see it as a glass half empty – and evaporating quickly.
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There are online forms you can fill out to send to your lawmakers, demanding that nothing – nothing at all or in any way – be done about any guns whatever, anywhere.
DICK CAVETT