“I’d say people get to work and start being more understanding of everybody – instead of calling everybody names, start being more understanding. But get in there and get it done. Kick ass and take names. And this may be my dad talking, but don’t spend what you don’t have.”

You, me, we own this country. Politicians are employees of ours, And when somebody does not do the job, we got to let them go.

I do believe in self-help.

Michael Moore and I actually have a lot in common. We both appreciate living in a country where there’s free expression. But Michael, if you ever show up at my front door with a camera, I’ll kill you. I mean it.

There are two kinds of people in this world. ‘I’ people and ‘we’ people. I’ve always tried to be a ‘we’ person.

The guys who won World War II and that whole generation have disappeared, and now we have a bunch of teenage twits.

You have to feel confident. If you don’t, then you’re going to be hesitant and defensive, and there’ll be a lot of things working against you.

I mean, I’ve always been a libertarian. Leave everybody alone. Let everybody else do what they want. Just stay out of everybody else’s hair.

Crimes against children are the most heinous crime. That, for me, would be a reason for capital punishment because children are innocent and need the guidance of an adult society.

Whether you like it or not, you’re forced to come to the realisation that death is out there. But I don’t fear death, I’m a fatalist. I believe when it’s your time, that’s it. It’s the hand you’re dealt.

Over the years, I realized there was a Republican philosophy that I liked. And then they lost it. And LIBERTARIANS had more of it. Because what I really believe is, let’s spend a little more time leaving everybody alone.

There’s a rebel lying deep in my soul.

Opinions are like a**holes, everybody has one.

No, I don’t have to practice that grunt. You just do it. Once you’re in character, you’re in character. You don’t sit there purposely thinking, Well, I’ll grunt here, or I’ll groan there.

My wife is my closest friend. Sure, I’m attracted to her in every way possible, but that’s not the answer. Because I’ve been attracted to other people, and I couldn’t stand ’em after a while.

It’s a hell of a thing, killing a man. You take away all he’s got and all he’s ever gonna have.

Go ahead, make my day.

I gotta be honest with you. Im kind of jealous of the way my dad gets to talk to my mom sometimes. Where are all those old-school women you can just take your day out on? When did they stop making those angels?

Look, my dad has a saying – we’ll burn that bridge when get to it. OK? You get it? Worry about tomorrow, tomorrow.

God brought me to Himself at about the age of 4. My parents were devout believers and my Dad was in Bible College at the time.

My dad got me a chemistry book one Christmas and I burnt the garden shed down. I remember there was the most beautiful smell forever after in the remains.

My dad liked to boil a squirrel head and suck the brains out the nose. Smaller than a chicken, bigger than a rat.

The child supplies the power but the parents have to do the steering.

I always thought that dads in the old days where rather macho types who wouldn’t get close to a baby, let alone change nappies.

When I seemed to be irritable or sad, my father would quote the learned Dr. Knight, and then say, ‘Just go to sleep.’ Like all smart aleck kids, I thought the advice was silly. But as I’ve grown older, I’ve realized just how smart Knight was.