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If one’s sense of self is obtained through the eyes of another it is always subject to being lost.

Brenda Shoshanna

Who you are is always enough. If your partner wants something different, it does not reflect upon you, but upon their needs and fantasies.
BRENDA SHOSHANNA

Different People Something Want
our joy and satisfaction comes from doing each action with a whole heart and mind. Results and consequences then take care of themselves. When you are not absorbed by concern for outcomes, how much anxiety can you ever have?
BRENDA SHOSHANNA

Absorb Attention Result Themselves
A time of uncertainty, of not knowing exactly where we’re headed, or what kind of choice to make is a Zen moment.
BRENDA SHOSHANNA

Choices Knowing Time
Be honest and simple. As you keep track all week long, you’ll be amazed at what claims your attention, what you give your precious life force to.
BRENDA SHOSHANNA

Amazed Honest Precious Simple
When we sit, we open our own treasure house. Rather than do this, however, most of us first seek to find the treasures another person can provide.
BRENDA SHOSHANNA

House Relationship Treasure
This is how we know we are in a loving relationship. We are blooming, and the one we love is blooming as well.
BRENDA SHOSHANNA

Blooming Love Loving Relationship
If one’s sense of self is obtained through the eyes of another it is always subject to being lost.
BRENDA SHOSHANNA

Eye Lost Self Sense
We calculate their value to us. When we approach relationships in this manner, we are coming as beggars, seeing the other as a source of supply.
BRENDA SHOSHANNA

Beggar Coming Relationship Source Supply
In a relationship if you are giving and getting nothing back in return, stop giving so much, and spend time being. Give to yourself, be who you are.
BRENDA SHOSHANNA

Giving Relationship Time
The more we give attention to that which is upsetting, the more strength it has to rule our lives.
BRENDA SHOSHANNA

Lived More Rule Strength
Consider for a moment what you pay attention to all day long. What seems important to you, what do you take for granted and hardly attend to at all? Write it down. Do not judge your answers.
BRENDA SHOSHANNA

Honesty Simple Writing
When we are in a truly loving relationship, we receive the gift of being known and accepted. We become more, not less, of who we are.
BRENDA SHOSHANNA

Love Relationship Space
Fear of the future and longing for the past are major factors which impede appropriate action.
BRENDA SHOSHANNA

Action Future Past
Relying on another is an expression of attachment, not love, a manifestation of insecurity and suffering, not understanding the true nature of our lives.
BRENDA SHOSHANNA

Attachment Love Nature
The sense that my world is stable and stationary, that change will never come and that all will go on continuously as it is, is the nature of all delusion.
BRENDA SHOSHANNA

Change Goes Nature
Zen practice asks you not to worry about who you ‘should’ become. Find out who you are right now.
BRENDA SHOSHANNA

Practice Should Worry

If one’s sense of self is obtained through the eyes of another it is always subject to being lost.

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If one’s sense of self is obtained through the eyes of another it is always subject to being lost.

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