There is absolutely no one, apart from yourself, who can prevent you, in the middle of the night, from sneaking down to tidy up the edges of that hunk of cheese at the back of the fridge.
BORIS JOHNSONMy friends, as I have discovered myself, there are no disasters, only opportunities. And, indeed, opportunities for fresh disasters.
More Boris Johnson Quotes
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Nothing excites compassion, in friend and foe alike, as much as the sight of you ker-splonked on the Tarmac with your propeller buried six feet under.
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The difference between Hitler’s speeches and Churchill’s speeches was that Hitler made you think he could do anything; Churchill made you think you could do anything.
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You are part of our Great British family.
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The dreadful truth is that when people come to see their MP, they have run out of better ideas.
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In 1904, 20 per cent of journeys were made by bicycle in London. I want to see a figure like that again. If you can’t turn the clock back to 1904, what’s the point of being a Conservative?
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Some people think that it [Brexit] is the end of the world. It’s not. On the contrary, it’s a massive opportunity for this country.
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I lead a life of blameless domesticity and always have done.
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I’m no communist.I’m a tax cutting Conservative. But I want a capitalism that is fairer to forgotten people.
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Try as I might, I could not look at an overhead projection of a growth profit matrix and stay conscious.
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I have come to the conclusion that Tony Blair has finally gone mad … he made assertions that are so jaw-droppingly and breathtakingly at variance with reality that he surely needs professional psychiatric help.
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I have not been more robust towards female rather than male assembly members and I do not believe I have been remotely sexist.
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If gay marriage was OK … then I saw no reason in principle why a union should not be consecrated between three men, as well as two men; or indeed three men and a dog.
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My policy on cake is pro having it and pro eating it.
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All the people I talk to, increasingly, can see that the emperor has got no clothes. The case for leaving [the EU] is now overwhelming.
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Hitler showed the evil that could be done by the art of rhetoric. Churchill showed how it could help to save humanity.
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You know, sometimes I don’t understand what’s wrong with us. This is just about the most creative and imaginative country on earth—and yet sometimes we just don’t seem to have the gumption to exploit our intellectual property.
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London is a fantastic creator of jobs – but many of these jobs are going to people who don’t originate in this country.
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I would ban sweets from school – but this pressure to bring in healthy food is too much.
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Voting Tory will cause your wife to have bigger breasts and increase your chances of owning a BMW M3.
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I’m afraid Sadiq Khan is completely wrong. The European Court of Justice is the supreme legal authority in our country.
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Life isn’t like coursework, baby. It’s one damn essay crisis after another.
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I love swimming in rivers, and well remember once jumping in at Chiswick.
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It is possible to have a pretty good life and career being a leech and a parasite in the media world, gadding about from TV studio to TV studio, writing inconsequential pieces and having a good time.
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I think I was once given cocaine but I sneezed so it didn’t go up my nose. In fact, it may have been icing sugar.
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We should celebrate immigrants and everything they do for our country.
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What Hitler did in his concentration camps was equalled if not exceeded in foulness by the Soviet gulags, forced starvation and pogroms.
BORIS JOHNSON