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My chances of being PM are about as good as the chances of finding Elvis on Mars, or my being reincarnated as an olive.

Boris Johnson

Do you seriously propose that they are going to be so insane as to allow tariffs to be imposed. The EU is, I’m afraid a job destroying engine.
BORIS JOHNSON

Country Europe Jobs
I don’t believe that economic equality is possible; indeed some measure of inequality is essential for the spirit of envy and keeping up with the Joneses that is, like greed, a valuable spur to economic activity.
BORIS JOHNSON

Believe Envy Stress
I lead a life of blameless domesticity and always have done.
BORIS JOHNSON

Blame Leadership Life Myself
I love tennis with a passion. I challenged Boris Becker to a match once and he said he was up for it but he never called back. I bet I could make him run around.
BORIS JOHNSON

Him Love Myself Passion Run
Can I say anything good about Ken Livingstone? A long time ago he did some good things, but I can’t now remember what any of them were.
BORIS JOHNSON

Goodness Myself Remember Talk
Nothing excites compassion, in friend and foe alike, as much as the sight of you ker-splonked on the Tarmac with your propeller buried six feet under.
BORIS JOHNSON

Compassion Excitement Sight
If we judged everybody by the stupid, unguarded things they blurt out to their nearest and dearest, then we wouldn’t ever get anywhere.
BORIS JOHNSON

Guard Judgment Stupidity
Nothing excites compassion, in friend and foe alike, as much as the sight of you ker-splonked on the Tarmac with your propeller buried six feet under.
BORIS JOHNSON

Compassion Feet Sight
The Geiger-counter of Olympomania is going to go zoink off the scale.
BORIS JOHNSON

Country Olympics People Scales
This is a super masticated subject, and it is time to spit it out.
BORIS JOHNSON

Scorn Spit Subjects
If gay marriage was OK … then I saw no reason in principle why a union should not be consecrated between three men, as well as two men; or indeed three men and a dog.
BORIS JOHNSON

Dog Man Marriage Principle Relationship
The meat in the sausage has got to be Conservative.
BORIS JOHNSON

Conservatism Meat
I am supporting David Cameron purely out of cynical self-interest.
BORIS JOHNSON

Interest Myself Pure Support
Never in my life did I think I would be congratulated by Mick Jagger for achieving anything.
BORIS JOHNSON

Achievement Life Myself Thinking
Hitler showed the evil that could be done by the art of rhetoric. Churchill showed how it could help to save humanity.
BORIS JOHNSON

Art Evil Help Himself Humanity Save
The crucial thing is to look in an informed way at what’s going on. Look at the way in which we are forced by our imbalanced system to push away people who might contribute mightily to the NHS.
BORIS JOHNSON

Force Imbalance Looks People System

My chances of being PM are about as good as the chances of finding Elvis on Mars, or my being reincarnated as an olive.

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My chances of being PM are about as good as the chances of finding Elvis on Mars, or my being reincarnated as an olive.

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