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Television is the box they buried entertainment in.

Bob Hope

I don’t do a lot of political jokes. Too many are getting elected.
BOB HOPE

Country People Political Jokes
I see the Beatles have arrived from England. They were 40 pounds overweight – and that was just their hair.
BOB HOPE

England Hair Line One
I was called Rembrandt Hope in my boxing days, because I spent so much time on the canvas.
BOB HOPE

Boxing Canvas Funny Sports
She said she was approaching forty, and I couldn’t help wondering from what direction.
BOB HOPE

Comedy Direction Helping Life Wondering
I like to play in the low 70’s. If it gets any hotter than that I’ll stay in the bar!
BOB HOPE

Bars Golf Hotter Play
I’d give up golf if I didn’t have so many sweaters.
BOB HOPE

Giving Golf Sweaters Up
A photographer kept shooting me every time I swung. I was very flattered until I found out he was from Field and Stream.
BOB HOPE

Fields Flatterers Golf Shooting
President Eisenhower has given up golf for painting. It takes fewer strokes.
BOB HOPE

Golf Painting President
We had a very successful trip to Russia. We made it back.
BOB HOPE

Funny Humorous Successful
The stealth bomber is supposed to be a big deal. It flies in undetected, bombs, then flies away. Hell, I’ve been doing that all my life.
BOB HOPE

Bombers Bombs Hell
For the first time, you can actually see the losers turn green
BOB HOPE

Firsts Green Oscars
I love to go to Washington – if only to be near my money.
BOB HOPE

Country Funny Love People Witty
Chiropractic is a wonderful means of natural healing!
BOB HOPE

Healing Mean Wonderful
Free speech isn’t dead in Germany and Italy, merely the speakers.
BOB HOPE

Funny Humorous Italian
We’re on our way to the Persian Gulf. Wait! It’s a mistake! I thought they said Persian Golf.
BOB HOPE

Golf Mistake Persian Waiting Way
We didn’t know that in America after the war, you wouldn’t be able to get into a sushi joint without a reservation. And we thought they lost.
BOB HOPE

Able Although Country Lost Reservation

Television is the box they buried entertainment in.

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Television is the box they buried entertainment in.

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