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I don’t think I’d have been in such a hurry to reach adulthood if I’d known the whole thing was going to be ad-libbed.

Bill Watterson

I don’t know how to spell it and I’m not allowed to say it. Could you just rattle off all the swear words you know and I’ll stop you when…Hello?
BILL WATTERSON

Allowed Hello Rattle Say Stop Swear Words
You know, there are times when it’s a source of personal pride to not be human.
BILL WATTERSON

Humans Pride Source
Scientific Progress goes boink?
BILL WATTERSON

Hobbes Progress Scientific Progress
Ah, the life of a newspaper cartoonist – how I miss the groupies, drugs and trashed hotel rooms!
BILL WATTERSON

Drugs Missing Rooms Trashed
So the secret to good self-esteem is to lower your expectations to the point where they’re already met?
BILL WATTERSON

Esteem Expectations Secret Self
From now on, I’ll connect the dots my own way.
BILL WATTERSON

Conformity Connect Dots Way
Look! A trickle of water running through some dirt! I’d say our afternoon just got booked solid!
BILL WATTERSON

Humorous Running Solid Water
If your knees aren’t green by the end of the day, you ought to seriously re-examine your life.
BILL WATTERSON

Examine Fun Garden Life
You know, sometimes kids get bad grades in school because the class moves too slow for them. Einstein got D’s in school. Well guess what, I get F’s!!!
BILL WATTERSON

Funny Guess Moving School
The secret to enjoying your job is to have a hobby that’s even worse
BILL WATTERSON

Hobbies Jobs Secrets
Calvin: Trick or treat! Adult: Where’s your costume? What are you supposed to be? Calvin: I’m yet another resource-consuming kid in an overpopulated planet.
BILL WATTERSON

Boys Kids Resources Scary Supposed
It’s surprising how hard we’ll work when the work is done just for ourselves.
BILL WATTERSON

Done Hard Surprising
I hate to think that all my current experiences will someday become stories with no point.
BILL WATTERSON

Hate Point Stories Thinking
Barney’s Dad was really bad so Barney hatched a plan when his dad said “Eat your peas.” Barney shouted no and ran Barney tricked his mean old dad and locked him in the cellar Barney’s Mom never found out where he’d gone, Cause Barney didn’t tell her. T
BILL WATTERSON

Dad Mom Peas Plan Sorry
Do you feel lonely? I don’t have the courage to face reality so I get lost in my dreams. You know what’s weird? Day by day, nothing seems to change. But pretty soon, everything’s different.
BILL WATTERSON

Courage Different Everything Lonely Pretty
Surprise is the essence of humor, and nothing is more surprising than truth.
BILL WATTERSON

Essence Surprise Surprising

I don’t think I’d have been in such a hurry to reach adulthood if I’d known the whole thing was going to be ad-libbed.

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I don’t think I’d have been in such a hurry to reach adulthood if I’d known the whole thing was going to be ad-libbed.

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Popular Authors

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