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I’d hate to have a kid like me.

Bill Watterson

Everyone knows that! Hobbes: I’m looking it up. Calvin: You do, and I’ll look up that 12-letter word you played with all the Xs and Js! Hobbes: What’s your score for ZQFMGB? Calvin: 957.
BILL WATTERSON

Everyone Knows Letter Played Score Word
I was reading about how countless species are being pushed toward extinction by man’s destruction of forests. . . .
BILL WATTERSON

Forest Intelligent Reading Thinking
It’s psychosomatic. You need a lobotomy. I’ll get a saw.
BILL WATTERSON

Lobotomy Needs Saws
A little rudeness and disrespect can elevate a meaningless interaction to a battle of wills and add drama to an otherwise dull day.
BILL WATTERSON

Battle Disrespect Drama InterAction
[Calvin, who has the chicken pox, calls Susie on the telephone.] Susie: Hello? Calvin: Hi, Susie! It’s me, Calvin! I was wondering if you’d like to come over and play. Susie: Why, sure! Boy,
BILL WATTERSON

Dad Letting Mom Wondering
Why waste time learning, when ignorance is instantaneous?
BILL WATTERSON

Ignorance Learning Waste
The real fun of living wisely is that you get to be smug about it.
BILL WATTERSON

Fun Real Smug Wisely
I’ve been amazed at how one idea leads to others if I allow my mind to play and wander.
BILL WATTERSON

Amazed Ideas Mind Wander
On the other hand, the mass media is disintegrating, and audiences are atomizing. I suspect comics will have less widespread cultural impact and make a lot less money.
BILL WATTERSON

Cultural Disintegrating Impact Less Money
Hobbes: Do you think there’s a God? Calvin: Well, somebody’s out to get me!
BILL WATTERSON

Hobbes Thinking Wells
God put me on this earth to accomplish a certain number of things. Right now I am so far behind that I will never die.
BILL WATTERSON

Accomplish Funny Life Motivational Nothing
I’m learning skills I will use for the rest of my life by doing homework…procrastinating and negotiation.
BILL WATTERSON

Homework Negotiation Procrastinating Skills Use
Van Gogh would’ve sold more than one painting if he’d put tigers in them.
BILL WATTERSON

Painting Solve Tigers Vans
Calvin: Look, a dead bird! Hobbes: It must’ve hit a window. Calvin: Isn’t it beautiful? It’s so delicate. Sighhh… once it’s too late, you appreciate what a miracle life is.
BILL WATTERSON

Beautiful Grow Up Thinking
Hobbes: Jump! Jump! Jump! I win! Calvin: You win? Aaugghh! You won last time! I hate it when you win! Aarrggh! Mff! Gnnk! I hate this game! I hate the whole world! Aghhh!
BILL WATTERSON

Really Running Stupid
I don’t think I’d have been in such a hurry to reach adulthood if I’d known the whole thing was going to be ad-libbed.
BILL WATTERSON

Adulthood Growing Thinking

I’d hate to have a kid like me.

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I’d hate to have a kid like me.

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