You know the theory of cell irritability? If you take an amoeba cell and poke it a thousand times, it will change and then re-form into its original shape. And then, the thousandth time you poke this amoeba.
BILL MURRAYWe’re Americans! Do you know what that means? It means our forefathers were kicked out of every decent country in the world.
More Bill Murray Quotes
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Chicks dig me because I rarely wear underwear, and when I do, it’s usually something unusual.
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I’m just an obnoxious guy who can make it appear charming, that’s what they pay me to do.
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I mean, everybody would love to have their clothes torn off by a mob of girls, but being screamed at is different.
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I go home and stay there. I wash and scrub up each day, and that’s it. One month I actually grew a moustache, just so I could say that I’d done something.
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I didn’t get into this position by being like a stiff sitting on the set in a folding chair. I did it by walking around on the streets and stirring things up.
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This is not a dress rehearsal; this is your life.
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You’ll never be good if you don’t know that you are.
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Disneyland. The world’s biggest people trap, built by a mouse.
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I think all phases of one’s career are serious if you take it seriously no matter if you are doing high profile dramatic pieces or not.
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Afghanistan is just one of those countries that no group can conquer. It’s so challenging to live, and the people are so close among their own tribes, their own groups, that you can’t rule them all, you can’t get an accord from all of them.
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There’s only a couple times when fame is ever helpful. Sometimes you can get into a restaurant where the kitchen is just closing.
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So far, I’ve only sailed in the Caribbean. I’ve sailed the Virgin Island and The Grenadines. I liked all that. We charted some really crummy boats in the Grenadines. That made for an exciting sailing trip (laughs) when everything goes well.
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I was at the New York Film Critics Circle Awards one year – they called me up when somebody canceled two days before the thing, and asked me to present some awards.
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In Japan, you have no idea what they are saying, and they can’t help you either. Nothing makes any sense. They’re very polite, but you feel like a joke is being played on you the entire time you’re there.
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I don’t answer fan mail. I don’t have time for that. It’s like hundreds of thousands of people who think they’re going to become millionaires getting autographs from movie actors. I don’t have time for those idiots. I’ve got stuff to do.
BILL MURRAY







