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I was in a cab in New York. The cab had a sign, “Please do not smoke, Christ is our unseen guest.” This guy was reaching.

Bill Hicks

I love talking about Kennedy assassination…a great archetypal example of how totalitarian government…sorry, wrong meeting.
BILL HICKS

Government Sorry Talking
Sixteen years I’ve pounded my head against the mentality of America, which…I’d say it’s about an 8th grade emotional level.
BILL HICKS

Country Emotional Years
Marijuana grows naturally…Don’t you think making nature against the law seems a bit, I don’t know, unnatural?
BILL HICKS

Law Marijuana Thinking
Truly, the only stupid people I’ve ever met, the most absolutely clueless, are the very people that produce television.
BILL HICKS

Clueless People Stupid
I’ve learned a lot about women. I think I’ve learned exactly how the fall of man occured in the Garden of Eden. Adam and Eve were in the Garden of Eden, and Adam said one day, Wow, Eve, here we are, at one with nature, at one with God, we’ll never age.
BILL HICKS

Dream Exactly Fall Learned Men Women
We’ll see who believes in me now. I am the Prankster God – I am killing me!
BILL HICKS

Believe Killing Pranksters
I ascribe to Mark Twain’s theory that the last person who should be President is the one who wants it the most. The one who should be picked is the one who should be dragged kicking and screaming into the White House.
BILL HICKS

Funny Humor Ideas Revolutionary
I saw…a kid on a leash. You seen these people? Kid on a leash? How horrible. Put him in the pound where he belongs.
BILL HICKS

Horrible Kids People Saws
How would you like to get inside that guy’s mind and look around for a hour? That guy sees opportunity at every glance, doesn’t he?
BILL HICKS

Around Glance Guy Look
No one can give you any answers. There aren’t any. You have to discover for yourself-you must learn to navigate the mystery.
BILL HICKS

Answers Giving Mystery
The definition of black irony is Pro-lifers killing Doctors who do abortions
BILL HICKS

Doctor Funny Humor
The CIA has a plot…they’ve used before to get rid of world leaders. Only problem…is convincing Hussein…to fly to Dallas.
BILL HICKS

Dallas Leader Plot
In the beginning God created the heavans and the earth… see you at the final.
BILL HICKS

Earth Finals Heaven
It’s not a war on drugs, it’s a war on personal freedom.
BILL HICKS

Drug Freedom Personal War
You think when Jesus comes back, he really wants to see a cross? That’s like going up to Jackie Onassis with a rifle pendant on.
BILL HICKS

Jesus Religious Thinking
I’ve been on what I call my UFO Tour, which means, like UFOs, I too have been appearing in small southern towns in front of a handful of hillbillies lately.
BILL HICKS

Flying Southern Towns

I was in a cab in New York. The cab had a sign, “Please do not smoke, Christ is our unseen guest.” This guy was reaching.

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I was in a cab in New York. The cab had a sign, “Please do not smoke, Christ is our unseen guest.” This guy was reaching.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

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