Keith Richards outlived Jim Fixx, the runner and health-nut dude. The plot thickens.
BILL HICKSI smoke to fill the potholes in my soul
More Bill Hicks Quotes
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I never got along with my dad. Kids used to come up to me and say, ‘My dad can beat up your dad.’ I’d say ‘Yeah? When?’
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I’m tired of this back-slappin’ “isn’t humanity neat” bullshit. We’re a virus with shoes.
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You ever seen somebody do that? I’ve seen someone do that. Let me tell you something – if you’re smoking out of a hole in your neck [mimics it again] I’d think about quitting. And that’s just me, ya know.
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Supreme Court says pornography is anything without artistic merit that causes sexual thoughts, that’s their definition, essentially. No artistic merit, causes sexual thoughts. Hmm… Sounds like… every commercial on television, doesn’t it?
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The definition of black irony is Pro-lifers killing Doctors who do abortions
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Music is a great energizer. It’s a language everybody knows.
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I was told when I grew up I could be anything I wanted: a fireman, a policeman, a doctor – even President, it seemed. And for the first time in the history of mankind, something new, called an astronaut. But like so many kids brought up on a steady diet of Westerns.
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Mummy, I woke today and there was a Lincoln Log in me sock drawer! … That’s the story of Jesus.
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Your denial is beneath you, and thanks to the use of hallucinogenic drugs, I see through you.
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Speaking of Satan, I was watching Rush Limbaugh the other day.
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If you don’t think drugs have done good things for us, then take all of your records, tapes and CD’s and burn them.
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Is it impossible to imagine Americans sneaking into Mexico en masse, seeking regular employment and a better way of life?
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Why do we put people who are on drugs in jail? They’re sick, they’re not criminals. Sick people don’t get healed in prison. You see? It makes no sense.
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People always snap and think they’re Jesus. How come no one ever snaps and thinks they’re Buddha?
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What do you say we lighten things up and talk about abortion?
BILL HICKS







