A little good advice, a little bad advice.You go to Las Vegas, there’s like a devil and a devil and they’re just battling it out the whole time. It’s like, “Smoke some crack!” “Get a hooker!” And then I go, “YEA! Yea, this is a good town. Smoke some crack and get a hooker! Alright!”
BILL BURRYou know what a cubicle basically says? It basically says, like, ‘You know what? We don’t think you’re smart enough for an office, but we don’t want you to look at anybody.
More Bill Burr Quotes
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Business runs hot and cold so the more you’re in charge of your own destiny, the better off you are.
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I mean, stand up you’re by yourself and it’s live and when you’re acting, unless you’re doing a monologue, you’re interacting with somebody else. Even if you’re doing a monologue you’re saying it to somebody and it’s not live so you can do it a few times.
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I don’t mind either one [crowd that is more willing to interact or crowd that’s more ready to just watch]. Both of them are forms of listening to what I’m saying so I can’t ask for any more than that.
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As much as Metallica rocked, they always had these song names… ‘The Thing That Shouldn’t Be’. ‘The Chair That Wasn’t There’, you know?
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Actually they [ Netflix] were telling us to push it further and I’ve never gotten a nod like that from anybody in the industry, so it’s been awesome to work with them. I’m very happy where we’re at.
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I keep doing specials because I think there are a lot of people who make movies and TV who are fans of comedy – if they start to like you, they’ll get a project going and call you in.
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I love my dog. I hate bankers. I have issues with women. In my head, I’m a great guy.
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You’ll be laying there fantasizing about sleeping on a futon. There’s no risk when you go after a dream. There’s a tremendous amount to risk to playing it safe.
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I am so pro-swine flu it’s – it’s like ridiculous.
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I do my podcast on Mondays for a specific reason. A lot of people go to work and don’t like their jobs. If you give people something to laugh about, it’s good.
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I’m not going to lie. I am a psycho. Luckily, I get most of it out on stage.
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Don’t be a jerk to other comics and don’t let the business beat you down, stay positive and if you work your ass off you’re going to get somewhere.
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Any other town you go to there’s this little devil and a little angel on your shoulder.
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ou’re in control of your brain. When your brain is sending you bad information or bad thoughts, you can decide to go to the gym, or write a new joke – or if you’re on the road, go to a ball game…
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Being a stand-up comic, this isn’t a stepping-stone for me; it’s what I do, and this is what I’m always going to do. And even if I do a TV show, the only reasons to do a TV show is to get more people to know me to come out to my stand-up shows.
BILL BURR