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When it’s time to shuffle off this mortal coil, you leave your ashes to be composted.

Bette Midler

I’m confident that I’m as intelligent as many people, but I know that I’m not as intelligent as some. So in the presence of hyperintelligent people, I’m a shrinking violet because I don’t want to look like a fool. I know a little about a lot and a lot about a little.
BETTE MIDLER

Intelligent People Shrinking
[On Princess Anne:] Such an active, outdoorsy lass. She loves nature in spite of what it did to her.
BETTE MIDLER

Princess Royalty Spite
I’m looking for something that gives me a chance to stretch. Because I have my own work, and I can do anything I want in my own work – juggle, tap dance, anything I want.
BETTE MIDLER

Anything Stretch Work
Previously, the jokes were more related to current issues, political. Today people make about each other either funny or about people like Kim Kardashian. It’s brutal. Everything is so much vielschmutziger.
BETTE MIDLER

Brutal People Previously Today
If somebody makes me laugh, I’m his slave for life.
BETTE MIDLER

Laugh Laughing Slave
If you pick up a ukulele, it will make you unbelievably happy.
BETTE MIDLER

Happy Picks Ukulele
Honey, I can smell the scent of another woman from 500 paces.
BETTE MIDLER

Infidelity Pace Smell
[On Helen Reddy:] She ought to be arrested for loitering in front of an orchestra.
BETTE MIDLER

Helen Orchestra Singing
There comes a time whenyou haveto let yourclothesgo out in the world and try to make it on their own.
BETTE MIDLER

Time Trying World
I bear no grudges. I have a mind that retains nothing.
BETTE MIDLER

Bears Grudge Mind
While I was growing up, I believed I could do anything I could think of. So the challenge was always to keep thinking – to get to where I wanted to be and then to think of somewhere else to go.
BETTE MIDLER

Else Growing Somewhere Thinking
After thirty, a body has a mind of its own.
BETTE MIDLER

Age Birthday Funny Mind
Image is everything, and the voice or the idea or the song is hardly anything at all. Half the time the person isn’t even doing the singing. I’m a bit cynical about this [music] business.
BETTE MIDLER

Ideas Song Voice
Unfortunately, every time there’s a budget crunch in New York, the Parks Department is usually the first to be cut. So they need all the help they can get.
BETTE MIDLER

Country Cutting Parks
I never know how much of what I say is true.
BETTE MIDLER

Cynicism Funny Truth
If sex is such a natural phenomenon, how come there are so many books on how to do it?
BETTE MIDLER

Funny Hilarious Love

When it’s time to shuffle off this mortal coil, you leave your ashes to be composted.

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When it’s time to shuffle off this mortal coil, you leave your ashes to be composted.

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Popular Authors

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