“I enjoy Augusta. I enjoy its challenges. There’s no other golf course like this anywhere. Its greens and its challenges on and around the greens are just super, super tough. So the greens are fun to play in sort of a morbid way”

My golf game’s gone off so much that when I went fishing a couple of weeks ago my first cast missed the lake.

I’m going to leave y’all with one thought. I’m a big believer in fate. I have a good feeling about this.

I know most players do, but I always keep both eyes opened. I still do it. I see two shafts, the real one and the transparent one. I look for what’s on the inside edge of the transparent one

I had a few miracles happen out there today.

The reason the Road Hole at St. Andrews is the most difficult par 4 in the world is that it was designed as a par 6.

But, if you miss (the supposedly easy pin) by just a little bit, you’re looking at the next putt from 30 feet. The ball just rolls away.

If we are to preserve the integrity of golf as left to us by our forefathers, it is up to all of us to carry on the true spirit of the game.

I have felt terribly from the beginning when I saw the problems and recognized that they would be ongoing. We were hired to put back the contours of the greens as closely as possible to George Thomas’s designs and were real proud of what we did. It’s a sad situation now.

It’s Star Wars golf. This place was designed by Darth Vader.

The game embarrasses you until you feel inadequate.

I don’t have any big secret about putting. Just hit at it. It’s either going to miss or go in.

I was horrified. Absolutely heart sick. All I could think of was that after 23 years together, I’d lost my faithful ally. I couldn’t sleep, couldn’t get the loss out of my mind. It was like discovering that someone in my family had died.

I had a 15th club in my bag.

You learn to accept defeat graciously in golf. Unlike other sports, the game itself is a constant opponent. It never stops. A golfer is fortunate to win a few times. We spend our whole lives trying to conquer something, and we lose a lot more than we win.

I feel like I’ve won the tournament.

I’m about five inches from being an outstanding golfer. That’s the distance my left ear is from my right.

That was a great game of golf, fellers.

Pebble Beach is Alcatraz with grass.

I’ve been playing the game so long that my handicap is in Roman numerals.

I’m from Southern California, so I feel much more comfortable with a golf club in my hand than I do a weapon.

Whenever I play with him , I usually try to make it a foursome – the President, myself, a paramedic and a faith healer.

I get upset over a bad shot just like anyone else. But it’s silly to let the game get to you.

Bing Crosby and I play a lot of golf together and I have a small course at my place where we often play for side stakes.

You figure they cheat at the ballpark, they’ll cheat on the golf course, they’ll cheat in business, and anything else in life. Players may laugh about it and say it’s funny, but right down in their heart, they don’t think it’s funny at all, and they have no respect for a person who cheats.