The liturgy is best treated and read as if it’s someone announcing the departure of trains.
ALAN BENNETTI have never understood disliking for war. It panders to instincts already catered for within the scope of any respectable domestic establishment.
More Alan Bennett Quotes
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The Breed never dies. Sapper, Buchan, Dornford Yates, practitioners in that school of Snobbery withViolence that runs like a thread of good-class tweed through twentieth-century literature.
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Why is it always the “intelligent” people who are socialists?
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I turned down a knighthood. It would be like having to wear a suit every day of your life.
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Of course my standards are out of date! That’s why they’re called standards.
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At the drabber moments of my life (swilling some excrement from the steps, for instance, or rooting with a bent coat-hanger down a blocked sink) thoughts occur like.
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[talking about the Holocaust] ‘But to put something in context is a step towards saying it can be understood and that it can be explained.
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I lack what the English call character, by which they mean the power to refrain.
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My school was a state school in Leeds and the headmaster usually sent students to Leeds University but he didn’t normally send them to Oxford or Cambridge.
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Cancer, like any other illness, is a bore.
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You always know when you’re going to arrive. If you go by car, you don’t. Apart from anything else, I prefer cycling. It puts you in a good mood, I find.
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Children always assume the sexual lives of their parents come to a grinding halt at their conception.
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That’s a bit like asking a man crawling across the Sahara whether he would prefer Perrier or Malvern water.
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Kafka could never have written as he did had he lived in a house.
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There are more microbes per person than the entire population of the world.
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Why do we not care to acknowledge them? The cattle, the body count.
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