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I thought I was gonna be an attorney, so I went to Dartmouth and I was a government major and I minored in environmental policy, and I didn’t do anything academically around the arts.

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Anything Art Attorney Environmental Government Major Minored Policy Thought

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I do not actually DO these things, but I see myself doing them, and that is almost MORE satisfying, because I am also lying down.
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Actually Almost Down Lying More Myself Satisfying
I was born in California, raised a vegetarian, and love science fiction, so don’t tell me how I need to be in order to fit your standards.
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Country Fiction Fit Love Need Order Raise Science Standard Vegetarian
I will say that stand-up is my first love; it’s how I got started and is in my bones.
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Real success and accomplishment, at whatever it is you are passionate about, requires real work.
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Accomplishment Passionate Require Running Sorry Success Wall Work
Pop culture is great, but it can be bad, at times.
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Bad Culture Great Pop Time
When I was younger, those kinds of comments bothered me, but eventually got to a point where I realized I wasn’t going to change who I was.
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Bother Change Comment Eventually Going Kind Point Realize Younger
I love to be busy and be challenged. I’m my happiest when I’m under pressure and almost overwhelmed by how much I have to get done.
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Almost Challengee Done Happiest Lucky Much Overwhelmed Pressure Under Wish
It is hard, it lasts all day, the lighting is generally fluorescent, and, apparently, drinking at your desk is frowned upon.
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Apparently Day Desk Drink Fluorescent Frown Generally Hard Last Lighting Upon
I was not one of those people who wanted to be a comedian when I was growing up. I liked comedy, but didn’t know it was something you could do for a living.
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College Comedian Growing Kid Loving People Up Wanted
All these young books for women are like I’m 29 with a closet full of Prada shoes and I can’t get a date. Come on.
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All Book Closet Come Date Like Prada Shoe Women Young
I’m black, and black don’t crack. It does droop.
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Black Crack Doe Droop
Marriage isn’t a carnival ride.
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Carnival Marriage Ride
I liked comedy, but didn’t know it was something you could do for a living. I actually wanted to be an attorney.
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Actually Attorney Comedy Living Something Wanted
You know, it’s about getting out there and having a good time. Not about worrying .
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Comedy is ugly. It’s honest, it’s raw.
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Comedy Honest Raw Ugly
Omnipresence can be a good or bad thing, I suppose. I don’t want to spend a lot of time thinking about it. I’m super-grateful.
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Bad Good Grateful Omnipresence Suppose Thing Thinking Want

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