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I feel like a person living on the brink of a volcano crater.

Agnes Smedley

Always before I had felt like a person, an individual, hopeful that I could mold my life according to some desire of my own.
AGNES SMEDLEY

According Always Before Desire Hopeful Individual Own Person Some
Gambling in the mark has been the great indoor sport of the capitalists for months, and consequently food has increased by 25 to 100 per cent.
AGNES SMEDLEY

Capitalist Consequently Food Gambling Great Increased Indoor Mark Month Sport Squash
Like all my family and class, I considered it a sign of weakness to show affection; to have been caught kissing my mother would have been a disgrace, and to have shown affection for my father would have been a disaster.
AGNES SMEDLEY

Affection Class Considered Day Disaster Family Fathers Kissing Mother Weakness
And the woman who could win the respect of man was often the woman who could knock him down with her bare fists and sit on him until he yelled for help.
AGNES SMEDLEY

Bare Down Fit Help Knock Man Respect Winning Women Yelled
It was a technical Marxist subject and I did not understand it nor did I know what questions to ask.
AGNES SMEDLEY

Ask Nor Question Subject Technical Understand
In the little hall leading to it was a rack holding various Socialist or radical newspapers, tracts, and pamphlets in very small print and on very bad paper.
AGNES SMEDLEY

Bad Holding Leading Little Newspaper Pamphlet Paper Radical Socialist Tract
But here in New York I was ignorant, insignificant, unimportant–one in millions whose destiny concerned no one. New York did not even know of my existence. Nor did it care.
AGNES SMEDLEY

Concerned Country Destiny Ignorant Insignificant Million Unimportant
But settled things were enemies to me and soon lost their newness and color. The unknown called.
AGNES SMEDLEY

Adventure Color Enemies Enemy Lost Newness Settled Unknown
The highest joy is to fight by the side of those who for any reason of their own making or ours, are unable to develop to full human stature.
AGNES SMEDLEY

Fight Highest Human Making Reason Side Stature Unable
There were fifty-four women and forty little boys with the Red Army prisoners, and I went daily to take care of them also.
AGNES SMEDLEY

Army Boy Care Daily Fifty Four Little Prisoner Red Women
I was ashamed of them and their ways of life. But now – yes, I love them; they are a part of my blood; they, with all their virtues and their faults, played a great part in forming my way of looking at life.
AGNES SMEDLEY

Ashamed Blood Fault Forming Life Looking Part Played Virtue Way
I would not let it ruin me as it ruined others! I would speak only with money, hard money.
AGNES SMEDLEY

Hard Let Money Other Ruin Ruined Speak
But there were years when, in search of what I thought was better, nobler things I denied these, my people, and my family.
AGNES SMEDLEY

Better Denied Family Nobler People Search Song Thing Thought Year
When I was a girl, the West was still young, and the law of force, of physical force, was dominant.
AGNES SMEDLEY

Dominant Force Girl Law Physical West Young
There are many men – such as those often to be found among the Indians – who are refined until they have qualities often attributed to the female sex. Yet they are men, and strong ones.
AGNES SMEDLEY

Found Indian Man Often Qualities Refined Sex Strong Until
I was learning that books and diagrams can be evil things if they deaden the mind of man and make him blind or cynical before subjection of any kind.
AGNES SMEDLEY

Blind Book Cynical Deaden Diagram Evil Learning Man Mind Subjective

I feel like a person living on the brink of a volcano crater.

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I feel like a person living on the brink of a volcano crater.

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