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The personal frustrations that they don’t dare let out on anyone else but a brother or sister,

Adele Faber

I was a wonderful parent before I had children.
ADELE FABER

Anand Thakur
No one cares / who is better / who is worse / who has more / who has less.
ADELE FABER

Anand Thakur
The mere existence of an additional child or children in the family could signify Less.
ADELE FABER

Additional Child Children Disappointment Existence Family Hurt Less Signity
Let us be different in our homes.
ADELE FABER

Anand Thakur
The resentment that each child feels for the privileges of the other;
ADELE FABER

Anand Thakur
The personal frustrations that they don’t dare let out on anyone else but a brother or sister,
ADELE FABER

Anand Thakur
From the normal irritations of living together, they learn how to assert themselves, defend themselves, compromise.
ADELE FABER

Anand Thakur
We deprive them of the experience that comes from wrestling with their own problems.
ADELE FABER

Anand Thakur
And sometimes, from their envy of each other’s special abilities they become inspired to work harder, persist and achieve.
ADELE FABER

Anand Thakur
Add to that the envy that one child feels for the accomplishments of the other;
ADELE FABER

Anand Thakur
Deep inside you know / when trouble comes / and there’s no one else to turn to
ADELE FABER

Anand Thakur
I was a wonderful parent before I had children.
ADELE FABER

Anand Thakur
Content in our connectedness / we are brothers and sisters / after all.
ADELE FABER

Anand Thakur
And it’s not hard to understand why in families across the land,
ADELE FABER

Anand Thakur
From their endless rough-housing with each other, they develop speed and agility.
ADELE FABER

Anand Thakur
From their verbal sparring they learn the difference between being clever and being hurtful.
ADELE FABER

Anand Thakur
We have another obligation to our children, and that is to affirm their “rightness.”
ADELE FABER

Anand Thakur
And once he’s clear about that reality, he gathers the strength to begin to cope.
ADELE FABER

Anand Thakur
Less time alone with parents. Less attention for hurts and disappointments. Less approval for accomplishments. . . .
ADELE FABER

Accomplishment Alone Approval Attention Less Parent
The whole world will tell them what’s wrong with them–out loud and often.
ADELE FABER

Anand Thakur
When we acknowledge a child’s feelings, we do him a great service.
ADELE FABER

Anand Thakur
Let us realize that along with food, shelter, and clothing
ADELE FABER

Anand Thakur
Comforters for our todays / Guardians of memories
ADELE FABER

Anand Thakur
Take two kids in competition for their parents’ love and attention.
ADELE FABER

Anand Thakur
Keeping our youth and yesterdays alive / Comrades with one history.
ADELE FABER

Anand Thakur
I was an expert on why everyone else was having problems with theirs. Then I had three of my own.
ADELE FABER

Anand Thakur
No wonder children struggle so fiercely to be first or best.
ADELE FABER

Best Children Fiercely First Struggle

The personal frustrations that they don’t dare let out on anyone else but a brother or sister,

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The personal frustrations that they don’t dare let out on anyone else but a brother or sister,

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