It’s something I’ve always kicked around, not doing the eBook but the Rich Man, Poor Man thing.
ADAM CAROLLAIf you’re conservative in Hollywood, you’re on a list of people who need to be put in their place.
More Adam Carolla Quotes
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There’s no bigger atheist than me. Well, I take that back. I’m a cancer screening away from going agnostic and a biopsy away from full-fledged Christian.
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Screw guilt — I could have sex with 10 men and it wouldn’t bother me. I’m an atheist!
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If my blond lab Molly was the size of T-Rex, that would just mean more kibble, more work for the gardener in the backyard, and a harder time moving her to my wife’s side of the bed at night.
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I want to work for myself, and I do work for myself. I make plenty of money working for myself.
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Then there’s the in-between, not a lipstick lesbian, not a butch dyke. I think that is what I’d be, a sweatpants lesbian.
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My life is about building and working and wrenching on some cars.
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The believe-in-yourself adage is grossly overrated.
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Chicks love dudes who are successful who happen to have money – do you know what I mean? Chicks are attracted to dudes that are doing their own thing.
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I’d never hurt another person.
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Oprah tells women what to read, what to eat, what to think, what to do.
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If you are tuning in just for the show, you’re going to be sorely disappointed.
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We’re all animals, that we all respond to the same stimuli. If you want to motivate somebody not to have premarital sex, or motivate black bears not to go diving into dumpsters, first you have to think about why they do it.
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Having sex without a condom is like riding a roller coaster with diarrhea. You can’t just throw your hands up and enjoy it.
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Speaking of sleeping bags, has anything ever had a less creative name?
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My mom was on welfare and the occasional food stamp, but I have never participated in any of those governmental programs, even the ones that kind of work like education, scholarships and whatever, and I managed to do just fine.
ADAM CAROLLA