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Welfare is monetary methadone.

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Heo Methadone Monetary Organisation Welfare

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If you spend your life walking through somebody else’s museum, you never find out whether you’re Rembrandt or not.
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Museums Rembrandt Somebody Spend Walking
They advertise the bejeeezus out of yogurt, but I haven’t seen one pie commercial.
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Advertize Bejeeezus Commercial Out Pie Seen Yogurt
I feel like I’m a time traveler from the future who has been sent back to be annoyed.
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Annoyed Feel Like Time Travel Traveler
I’ve got a great eye for color. I’m like a chick.
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Ability Assess Honest Honestly Important More Something Working
I have no connection with Hollywood. I’m not interested. I don’t care.
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Chicks named Tammy have a greater chance of actually driving a Mercedes than a chick named Mercedes.
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Actually Chance Chick Funny Humor Mercedes Name
When I fart my ass makes a trumpet sound that heralds the arrival of the smell.
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Arrival Funny Humor Smell Trumpet
I have feelings that are to the right, and I have feelings that land on the left side of the aisle.
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Screw guilt — I could have sex with 10 men and it wouldn’t bother me. I’m an atheist!
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You should feel good about yourself because of your accomplishments. Not because somebody yelled at you to feel good about yourself.
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Accomplishment Feel Good Should Yelled Yourself
I like my parents but they are just not good parents. They are nice enough people. I’m not interested in hurting their feelings.
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Whoever is for higher taxes, feel free to pay higher taxes.
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