I used to be a Democrat, now I’m basically a Republican.
ADAM CAROLLAThe pace of radio is very fast. Boom, boom, with a little six minute segment, then on to the next thing. With podcasts you can talk about something for 25 minutes if you like – there is a lot of artistic freedom with it.
More Adam Carolla Quotes
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What we used to settle with common sense or a fist, we settle with hand sanitizer and lawyers.
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When I say things that sound insane, like only the smartest million people should have the right to vote, well, I mean that.
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Well, the post office is probably not the place you want to go if you want to be infused with patriotism and a renewed sense of vigor.
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Those dads that go off to Florida and start a new life, I couldn’t imagine that: seeing my kid once every Christmas, every three years. If I’m gone for six days it feels like too much
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Screw guilt — I could have sex with 10 men and it wouldn’t bother me. I’m an atheist!
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Figure out what to do, then take a nap.
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We’re always going to want to see LeBron and Kobe go at it.
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Having sex without a condom is like riding a roller coaster with diarrhea. You can’t just throw your hands up and enjoy it.
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I know everything because I know nothing.
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I’d be at someone’s house or be up on the roof all day and I’d get lonely – stir crazy – and talk radio became this soothing voice in my life.
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Asking someone in advance not judge you, is like asking someone in advance not to smell you.
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Junior colleges are high schools with ashtrays.
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Whoever is for higher taxes, feel free to pay higher taxes.
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There are certain things women are better at than men.
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When I am king, I will revise the sexual bases system so that getting to first base will include oral sex and sodomy!
ADAM CAROLLA