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I know the Gospel according to Mark better than I know any sura in the Quran.

Aasif Mandvi

Because to Americans, Chechnya might as well be a suburb of Narnia.
AASIF MANDVI

Chechnya Country might Narnia Suburb
I never consciously got into comedy. It was sort of one of those things where I was a theater student, I was acting, I was doing comedy, I was doing dramatic stuff, so it’s been something that I’ve always done and enjoyed doing and had an instinct to be relatively good at.
AASIF MANDVI

Acting Comedy Conscious Done Stuff Theatre Thing
When I was 11 my friend’s mom made a peanut butter sandwich. I ate the sandwich and was like, ‘I’m never eating anything else again.’ And I still eat peanut butter every day. I would put peanut butter on a steak.
AASIF MANDVI

Ate Eating Friend Made Mom Peanut Butter Sandwich
If people invited Muslims into their home every week by way of a TV show would go a long way to making people feel comfortable with Muslims and countering misconceptions about who we are. Plus, of course, that will make it easier for us to impose sharia law across America.
AASIF MANDVI

Comfortable Every Feel Home Long People Week
Comedy can reach many more people than, say, a serious lecture on the topic. And comedy might just be the access point to reach people who want to be entertained and also learn something.
AASIF MANDVI

Access Comedy Feel Lecture People Serious Topic
You can get samosas in any pub in England today, pretty much. So, “Gunga Din” has come back.
AASIF MANDVI

Back Come England Pub Samosa Today
I grew up on American pop culture so everything that I fantasized about to get out of this sort of humdrum world of Bradford was about America. So when we decided to move there I was on the plane.
AASIF MANDVI

America Culture Dort Fantasized Grew Moving
Now the bigots have to get creative. Good luck coming up with slurs for Chechens. Go back where you came from, Ushanka head.
AASIF MANDVI

Bigot Chechen Committee Creative Good Luck
I think family dynamics are definitely very interesting. And in my case my sister did get married. She gave my parents a grandchild.
AASIF MANDVI

Definitely Dynamic Grandchildren Interesting Married Parent Sister Thinking
In Britain, you never get away from the fact that you’re a foreigner. In the U.S., the view is it doesn’t matter where you come from.
AASIF MANDVI

Come Fact Matter Views Where You
Samantha Bee said to me when I first started on the “Daily Show”, she was like no – there is no – the only way you’ll learn this job is by doing this job.
AASIF MANDVI

Daily First Job Learn No Samantha Bee She Show Started Way
I thought [when I was 16] my days were just going to be spent hanging out on a beach and my girlfriend was going to be Miss Teen USA and my best friend will be a dolphin.
AASIF MANDVI

Beach Day Enjoy Girlfriend Hanging Spent
An artist’s job is simply to take the mirror in front of your face and hold it there. It’s not to give you any answers. It is simply to take that mirror and point it at you.
AASIF MANDVI

Answer Artist Face Front Hold Job Mirror Simply
From my parent’s generation the idea was not that marriage was about some kind of idealized, romantic love. It was a partnership. It’s about creating family. It’s about creating offspring.
AASIF MANDVI

Creating Generation Idea Ideas Marriage Parent Romantic Love
When you’re brown and Indian, you get offered a lot of doctor roles.
AASIF MANDVI

Brown Doctor Indian Offer Roles
It’s an organic thing that I try not to analyze too much, because I worry that it will go away.
AASIF MANDVI

Analyze Away Going Try Trying Worry

I know the Gospel according to Mark better than I know any sura in the Quran.

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I know the Gospel according to Mark better than I know any sura in the Quran.

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