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Marilyn Monroe Paulo Coelho Abraham Lincoln C. S. Lewis Khalil Gibran Charlie Chaplin Gautama Buddha Isaac Newton

After I quit drinking, I realized I am the same asshole I always was; I just have fewer dents in my car.
ROBIN WILLIAMS

Alcohol Asshole Car Quit Realize
People say satire is dead. It’s not dead; it’s alive and living in the White House.
ROBIN WILLIAMS

Dead Funny Humour People
My favorite thing to do is ride a bicycle. I ride road bikes. And for me, it’s mobile meditation.
ROBIN WILLIAMS

Cycle Favourite Meditation Ride
I like my wine like my women – ready to pass out.
ROBIN WILLIAMS

Funny Marriage Wife Wine Women
You have to break in half to love somebody.
ROBIN WILLIAMS

Break Deep Love
I think the saddest people always try their hardest to make people happy because they know what it’s like to feel absolutely worthless and they don’t want anyone else to feel like that.
ROBIN WILLIAMS

Absolute Deep Happiness People Sad Try Want Worth
Most of all, I want to thank my father, up there, the man who when I said I wanted to be an actor, he said, ‘Wonderful. Just have a back-up profession like welding.’
ROBIN WILLIAMS

Actor Father Man Professional Thankful Want
What some folks call impossible is just stuff they haven’t seen before.
ROBIN WILLIAMS

Folk Impossible Inspirational Stuff
There are no rules. Just follow your heart.
ROBIN WILLIAMS

Attitude Follow Heart Inspirational Rule
I wonder what chairs think about all day: “Oh, here comes another asshole
ROBIN WILLIAMS

Asshole Chair Funny Thinking
You need a touch of madness, just enough that you don’t become stupid!
ROBIN WILLIAMS

Enough Madness Stupid Touch
I had sex with a prostitute when I was 21, I was so bad, she gave me a refund.
ROBIN WILLIAMS

Funny Prostitute Refund Sex
When in doubt, go for the dick joke.
ROBIN WILLIAMS

Doubt Funny Joke
Everyone you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about. Be kind. Always.
ROBIN WILLIAMS

Battle Fight Kindness Life Meet Relationship
If women ran the world, we wouldn’t have wars, just intense negotiations every 28 days.
ROBIN WILLIAMS

Funny Intense Negotiate War Women
Please, don’t worry so much. Because in the end, none of us have very long on this Earth. Life is fleeting.
ROBIN WILLIAMS

Earth Ending Inspirational Life Philosophy Worry

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