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If you want to get laid, go to college. If you want an education, go to the library.

Frank Zappa

If you want to get laid, go to college. If you want an education, go to the library.
FRANK ZAPPA

College Education Laid Library
Music is the only religion that delivers the goods.
FRANK ZAPPA

Deliver Goodness Music Religion
Republicans stand for raw, unbridled evil and greed and ignorance smothered in balloons and ribbons.
FRANK ZAPPA

Balloon Greed Ignorance Republic Ribbon
We could improve worldwide mental health if we acknowledged that parents can make you crazy.
FRANK ZAPPA

Acknowledgement Crazy Improvement Mental Health Parents
The universe consists of 5% protons, 5% neutrons, 5% electrons and 85% morons.
FRANK ZAPPA

Space Universe
I never set out to be weird. It was always other people who called me weird.
FRANK ZAPPA

People Weird
Reality is what it is, not what you want it to be.
FRANK ZAPPA

Atheist Life Reality
If your children ever find out how lame you really are, they’ll murder you in your sleep.
FRANK ZAPPA

Children Lame Murder Sleep
I’m not black, but there’s a whole lot of times I wish I could say I’m not white.
FRANK ZAPPA

Black White
Anything played wrong twice in a row is the beginning of an arrangement.
FRANK ZAPPA

Arrangement Beginning Inspirational Play Wrong
A drug is not bad. A drug is a chemical compound. The problem comes in when people who take drugs treat them like a license to behave like an asshole.
FRANK ZAPPA

Asshole Chemical Compound Drugs People
Science is moving closer to weaponry, and Art is moving closer to commercialism. And never the twain shall meet.
FRANK ZAPPA

Art Close Meet Science Weapon
The first thing you have to do if you want to raise nice kids, is you have to talk to them like they are people instead of talking to them like they’re property.
FRANK ZAPPA

Kids Positive Property
Drugs will turn you into your parents.
FRANK ZAPPA

Drugs Parents
A wise man once said, never discuss philosophy or politics in a disco environment.
FRANK ZAPPA

Disco Environment Philosophy Politics
There’s a big difference between kneeling down and bending over.
FRANK ZAPPA

Atheist Bend Difference Knee

If you want to get laid, go to college. If you want an education, go to the library.

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If you want to get laid, go to college. If you want an education, go to the library.

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