The richest people in the world aren’t particularly smart or happy. And the happiest people in the world aren’t particularly smart or rich. That leaves me making music. But we can’t talk about that.
FRANK ZAPPAJazz isn’t dead. It just smells funny.
More Frank Zappa Quotes
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If you want to get laid, go to college. If you want an education, go to the library.
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One size does not fit all.
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If your children ever find out how lame you really are, they’ll murder you in your sleep.
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It’s better to have something to remember than anything to regret.
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The computer can’t tell you the emotional story. It can give you the exact mathematical design, but what’s missing is the eyebrows.
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There is no such thing as a dirty word. Nor is there a word so powerful, that it’s going to send the listener to the lake of fire upon hearing it.
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All your children are poor unfortunate victims of systems beyond their control
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If you end up with a boring miserable life because you listened to your mom, your dad, your teacher, your priest, or some guy on television telling you how to do your shit, then you deserve it.
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One and one is eleven.
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Beauty is a pair of shoes that makes you wanna die.
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You can bet everything will come to an end. It’s going to be ugly and it’s going to be a mess, and it’s going to be something that somebody did in the name of God.
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Censoring what you say is one of the ways in which people who are not nice can take away your personal freedom.
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Republican is fine, if your a millionaire. Democrats is fair, if all you own is what you wear. Neither of them’s really right, cause neither of them care.
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There’s a big difference between kneeling down and bending over.
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There are only two things to remember. Number one: Don’t Stop, and number two: Keep going!
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My best advice to anyone who wants to raise a happy, mentally healthy child is: Keep him or her as far away from a church as you can.
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You are what you is, you is what you am, you ain’t what you’re not. So see what you got?
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May your shit come to life and kiss you on the face.
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Without deviation from the norm, progress is not possible.
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A drug is not bad. A drug is a chemical compound. The problem comes in when people who take drugs treat them like a license to behave like an asshole.
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Power will be maintained by the groovy guy or gal who gets the most media coverage for his sleaze. Naturally, his friends in various businesses will do okay, too.
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Art is making something out of nothing and selling it.
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Why do you necessarily have to be wrong just because a few million people think you are?
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A composer is a guy who goes around forcing his will on unsuspecting air molecules, often with the assistance of unsuspecting musicians.
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The only difference between a cult and a religion is the amount of real estate they own.
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There are more love songs than anything else. If songs could make you do something we’d all love one another.
FRANK ZAPPA