Regarding the fitness craze: America has lost its soul; now it’s trying to save its body.
GEORGE CARLINAlthough the photographer and the art thief were close friends, neither had ever taken the other’s picture.
More George Carlin Quotes
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Instead of warning pregnant women not to drink,I think female alcoholics ought to be told not to fuck.
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The only good thing ever to come out of religion was the music.
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So, have a little fun. Soon enough you’ll be dead and burning in Hell with the rest of your family.
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A cat will blink when struck with a hammer.
GEORGE CARLIN -
Weather forecast for tonight: dark. Continued dark overnight, with widely scattered light by morning.
GEORGE CARLIN -
If we could only find out who’s in charge, we could kill him.
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Religion is like drugs, it destroys the thinking mind.
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If you have selfish, ignorant citizens, you’re gonna get selfish, ignorant leaders.
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Most people work just hard enough not to get fired and get paid just enough money not to quit.
GEORGE CARLIN -
A good motto to live by: ‘Always try not to get killed.
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Pardon me I’ve got nothing to say.
GEORGE CARLIN -
Life is not measured by the breathes you take, but by the moments that take your breathe away.
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Everyone smiles in the same language.
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May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house.
GEORGE CARLIN -
Don’t confuse me with those who cling to hope.
GEORGE CARLIN