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I don’t think restaurants should refuse to serve minority people. They are quite tasty when prepared correctly.

Zach Braff

It’s… it’s such a weird thing. After Garden State, so many companies wanted to make my movies, and after The Last Kiss, I realized people would make anything I was in. As long as I keep this up I’ll be swimming in chubby indie girl pussy.
ZACH BRAFF

Girl Kissing Swimming
I once fisted two babies and then used the corpses as boxing gloves to fight off the grieving parents.
ZACH BRAFF

Baby Fighting Grieving
Sure the jews killed jesus, but the guy was an awful carpenter
ZACH BRAFF

Awful Guy Jesus
I’m a busy guy; I just get a lot of people that sound like me to go out and visit them. They don’t know the difference and, let’s face it, they aren’t going to be paying to see my movies anytime soon.
ZACH BRAFF

Differences Guy People
I really don’t give a care, I’m going to live for ever
ZACH BRAFF

Care Giving Really
Whenever I’m feeling a bit down, I always visit the local children’s hospital. Knowing that those cancer-kids wont be able to live long enough to surpass me in fame just warms my heart, you know?
ZACH BRAFF

Cancer Children Heart
The problem with doing commercials is that the only thing good enough for me to sell is myself, and I stopped doing that once I kicked my coke habit.
ZACH BRAFF

Coke Enough Good Problem
It blows my mind that there are people out there who deny the holocaust. Why would you ever deny such a great achievement. It’s like denying the cure for polio or something.
ZACH BRAFF

Achievement Blow People
I have a great relationship with my parents. I have not been on lithium.
ZACH BRAFF

Great Lithium Parent Relationship
Don’t get me started on cold toilet seats.
ZACH BRAFF

Cold Comfort Seat Toilet
The success of ‘Scrubs’ allowed me to pursue anything I felt passionately about without having to worry about money. It allowed me to spend my summer work shopping my show at a nonprofit theater.
ZACH BRAFF

Shopping Summer Worry
The thing about hitting kids is, think about if you were doing the same thing to another adult. Hitting your kid is really the same as hitting your employee or wife, and the issue become pretty clear when you think about it that way.
ZACH BRAFF

Issues Kid Thinking
I don’t think restaurants should refuse to serve minority people. They are quite tasty when prepared correctly.
ZACH BRAFF

Minorities People Thinking
I never really understood all the hype, until I got one of my own.
ZACH BRAFF

Hype Own Understood
I procrastinate so much and I get distracted by anything.
ZACH BRAFF

Anything Distracted Procrastinating
It’s hard for me not to be extraordinarily cute. I had to fight it.
ZACH BRAFF

Cute Fighting Hard

I don’t think restaurants should refuse to serve minority people. They are quite tasty when prepared correctly.

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I don’t think restaurants should refuse to serve minority people. They are quite tasty when prepared correctly.

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