The first year I had money, I really went shopping. I got really caught up in it. I bought all my brothers sets of luggage, and I bought ’em winter coats from Giorgio Armani – winter coats. And I got a pair of socks from this brother.
BILL MURRAYHuman sacrifice! Dogs and cats living together! Mass hysteria!
More Bill Murray Quotes
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You know the theory of cell irritability? If you take an amoeba cell and poke it a thousand times, it will change and then re-form into its original shape. And then, the thousandth time you poke this amoeba.
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My iPhone has 2 million times the storage of the 1969 Apollo 11 computer. They went to the moon. I throw birds at pig houses
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I was in the Virgin Islands once. I met a girl. We ate lobster, drank piña coladas. At sunset, we made love like sea otters. That was a pretty good day. Why couldn’t I get that day over and over and over?
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There’s only a couple times when fame is ever helpful. Sometimes you can get into a restaurant where the kitchen is just closing.
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I wanted to be a doctor once upon a time, but it turns out you’ve got to study, and that wasn’t going to happen. I had no idea what I was going to do. I had trouble holding jobs because they want you to be on time. That wasn’t going to work.
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You have to hope that [good things] happen to you. […] That’s the only thing we really, surely have, is hope. You hope that you can be alive, that things will happen to you that you’ll actually witness, that you’ll participate in.
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Every moment that you share someone else’s pain, feel what they feel, makes you more human.
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And I don’t like to work. I only like working when I’m working.
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You don’t have to have all this film stock, you can work faster, and you don’t need a giant crew. It’s great.
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There are people who drove me crazy, but they got the job done. And when I see that person again, I nod my head. Respect.
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He’s going on and on and on, and finally he stops. It’s just total horror, and the camera’s still rolling. You can hear it, sort of a grinding noise. And the director says, “Anything else, Bud?”
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I don’t know how this guy knew how much money I was making. I didn’t know how much money I was making.
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And go to places that are hard to go to and hard to get out of. And if when you come back to JFK, when you land in JFK, and you’re still in love with that person, get married at the airport.
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All of us kids ended up ‘doing Mom.’ There are four of us who’ve tried show business. Five if you insist on counting my sister the nun, who does liturgical dance.
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I would jump into the middle of the street and say, “excuse me, there’s a Mercedes that’s got to get through here.” And I would push people out of the way, “get out of the way! Let him through!” Smacking their cars and stuff. Just like, “whack” and you just jump into it.
BILL MURRAY