Was Einstein’s theory good? Relatively.
BO BURNHAMI’d really love to make something that doesn’t involve my stupid face.
More Bo Burnham Quotes
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Bitches and hoes don’t exist because the hoes know Bo’s a feminist.
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I worked eight hours a day just so I could get into the college of my dreams and say that I got in – and I never went.
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Because I see that as a crutch sometimes and I want to know that I can do something funny and worthwhile without that. And also make a show that my parents would like and that kids could watch with their parents.
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They must have some special kind of cereal!’ My mind was so warped by the idea of fame.
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I never felt like I was stealing anyone’s fans as much as I was introducing some younger people to comedy who will eventually find tons of other comedians that they love.
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Squaring numbers are just like women. If they’re under thirteen, just do them in your head.
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And if ten percent of men are gay and twenty percent of men are Chinese, what are the odds that a men chosen at random spends his free time and mealtime while on his knees.
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I got a safe full of cherries ’cause I pop it and lock it.
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I think comedy has a range, with multiple peaks in different areas. It’s like trying to compare Beethoven and the Beatles. Sometimes I hear from people, ‘I think you try too hard in your comedy.’ And that’s what I worry about.
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And two balls minus one, six titles at the tour de France.
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Where are all the sour patch parents?
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I believe, firmly, that women are always right. Ah, I should actually rephrase that: I… don’t.
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I know it’s the comedian’s instinct to say, “Do it, man, nothing’s off-limits! It’s cool, bro!” I don’t know if that’s the answer for me.
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I remember being superyoung, like nine or ten years old, and thinking, ‘Man, I wonder what famous people eat for breakfast.
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I have a pretty good math mind, so I can see patterns, but I don’t have a great ear. It’s like a tragedy – I can see so much more natural musical ability in so many other people.
BO BURNHAM







