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1. black
2. grey
3. blue
4. red
5. brown
6. white

Everyone should just drive out to the Mojave Desert and just experience it, and it’s a fun place to live.

Bill Burr

Related Topics

DesertFun

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  You have to understand how bad I wanted to be a comedian, how much I loved doing it. I still can’t believe I get to do this for a living and have people come up and want to see me.

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  Deny your emotions and act like you have answers

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  I love making movies, and being in any that I can be in. I’d like to be in those giant movies, as the fifth or sixth lead, and have three or four killer scenes. You don’t have the responsibility of the entire movie being on you. I like those roles. I’m shooting for the middle.

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  I was certified to take x-rays, but you can’t just show up and start cleaning people’s teeth.

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  I don’t mind it. I just space it out. Every other week I go out. I used to get some time to myself but I’ve been pretty busy lately. But I’ve had it the other way, where I’m staring at the phone waiting for it to ring, so this is definitely better.

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  I think it’s a privilege to be able to fly to somewhere where people want to see my show.

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  We need a plague. It’s gotta happen. And don’t worry, it’s only gonna kill the weak. Seriously. Put on a sweater, take some vitamins, you’re gonna be fine! We gotta let mother nature do her thing, man. She keeps trying to help us out and we won’t let her do it.

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  If I get married I get a tax break, if I have a kid I get a tax break, if I get a mortgage I get a tax break. I don’t have any kids and I drive a hybrid, I think I should get a tax break.

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  I’ve found is that by doing stand-up, I’ve actually learned how to combat depression. I don’t have clinical, but I’ve definitely had my bouts with it. I just figured out that it’s a choice. Y

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  The first guy who got Aids was a French flight attendant. How you like that Frenchie! You know when I come back and run for office, that may be the one that comes back and haunts me.

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  I consider Ric Flair to be one of the great comedic minds. But I never got to see him growing up because that was back when they still had territories.

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