Yes, OK, farty is a silly word. I wish I’d never used it. I’m 34. Perhaps it was a word for my 20s.
BEN ELTONI think it is very difficult to legislate for morality.
More Ben Elton Quotes
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And roast beef and Yorkshire pudding is my personal signature dish.
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Books are the key. A book cannot be accessed from afar. You have to hold it, you have to read it.
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My advice to anyone adapting a novel is that once they’ve read it and learnt to understand it, then they must throw it away and never look at it again!
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No collection of people who are all waiting for the same thing are capable of holding a natural conversation. Even if the thing they are waiting for is only a taxi.
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You think I look like a teletubby?
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Beyond love, beyond unrequited love, perhaps even beyond any other passion known to humanity, deep, deep in the depths of the turgid, clinging, swamplike pit of despair that lies dormant within every soul, lurks JEALOUSY.
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I think trying to be cool is the worst possible ambition – and I have never suffered from it.
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Sympathy for victims is always counter-balanced by an equal and opposite feeling of resentment towards them.
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I exercise hard and the reason I do is so that I can earn the things I like to consume.
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Artists don’t create society, they reflect it
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The earth only has so much bounty to offer and inventing ever larger and more notional prices for that bounty does not change its real value.
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There are lots of things I could have done for the money, but I’ve made a great living doing the things I want to do.
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People who get through life dependent on other people’s possessions are always the first to lecture you on how little possessions count.
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I’m easy to work with, not a pushover, but I respond to criticism and find it inspiring.
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I find the fact that billionaires are quoted as if the fact that they are billionaires gives them some kind of wisdom is outrageous.
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For the past seventeen years I have been experimenting with lager. I am a lager user and one drug leads to another. If you do lager, as night follows day, you’ll end up doing Kentucky Fried Chicken.
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I see dull people as projects … to be reformed
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We’ve all got to look at ourselves, start with yourself, that’s all you can do. I believe that we can act responsibly as a group, it’s just that there are vested interests telling us not to bother.
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And of course to hunt down sedition. Only paper is safe. Books are the key. A book cannot be accessed from afar, you have to hold it, you have to read it.
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Kingsley watched her disappear from the room, wondering if his heart would break. Logic informed him that of course it would not. The heart was no more than a muscle, a pump which distributed blood about the body.
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I don’t know what people who I’ve never met think about me. Some have written horrible things, some have written nice things – but I’m proud of the fact I’ve remained close to everyone I’ve ever worked with.
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This calls for a very special blend of psychology and extreme violence.
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The worst thing about being a great power is when you’re not one any more. It takes centuries to get over it.
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You didn’t wake up, your dreams just changed gear.
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The Germans are a cruel race. Their operas last for six hours and they have no word for fluffy.
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I don’t consider myself Jewish. I am half-Jewish by race but not through my mother.
BEN ELTON