One good reason to only maintain a small circle of friends is that three out of four murders are committed by people who know the victim.
GEORGE CARLINReligion is like drugs, it destroys the thinking mind.
More George Carlin Quotes
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Never argue with an idiot. They will only bring you down to their level and beat you with experience.
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I have lots of ideas. Trouble is, most of them suck.
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Life gets really simple once you cut out all the bull shit they teach you in school.
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There’s a humorous side to every situation. The challenge is to find it.
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Some people see the glass half full. Others see it half empty. I see a glass that’s twice as big as it needs to be.
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There are nights when the wolves are silent and only the moon howls.
GEORGE CARLIN -
I would never want to be a member of a group whose symbol was a man nailed to two pieces of wood.
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Inside every cynical person, there is a disappointed idealist.
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Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.
GEORGE CARLIN -
Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity.
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Religion is just mind control.
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The older you get, the better you realize you were.
GEORGE CARLIN -
Weather forecast for tonight: dark. Continued dark overnight, with widely scattered light by morning.
GEORGE CARLIN -
Religion is like drugs, it destroys the thinking mind.
GEORGE CARLIN -
I’ll bet there aren’t too many people hooked on crack who can play the bagpipes.
GEORGE CARLIN