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New Zealand is a country of thirty thousand million sheep, three million of whom think they are human.

Barry Humphries

The truth is deafening, no matter how softly it is spoken.
BARRY HUMPHRIES

Defend Matter Spoken Truth
I have outlived most of my more athletic contemporaries who jogged, golfed and squashed themselves into coronary occlusion.
BARRY HUMPHRIES

Athletic Contemporaries Coronary Golf Occlusion
The whole point of art, aside from the aesthetic pleasure it yields, is that it provides a bridge to the past; that seductive land where we all find certainty and consolation. Nothing quite spans this gulf with such immediacy as the art of popular song.
BARRY HUMPHRIES

Art Past Point Seductive Song
Sex is the most beautiful thing that can take place between a happily married man and his secretary.
BARRY HUMPHRIES

Beautiful Men Secretary Sex Thing
Most of my contemporaries at school entered the World of Business, the logical destiny of bores.
BARRY HUMPHRIES

Destiny Satire School Someone World
My parents were very pleased that I was in the army. The fact that I hated it somehow pleased them even more.
BARRY HUMPHRIES

Army Children Parent
I was born with a priceless gift, the ability to laugh at the misfortunes of others.
BARRY HUMPHRIES

Funny Laughing Priceless
If you can’t laugh at yourself, you may be missing the colossal joke of the century.
BARRY HUMPHRIES

Century Joke Laughing Missing
The past is so reliable, so delightful and the best place to live.
BARRY HUMPHRIES

Best Delightful Live Past Place
Never be afraid to laugh at yourself, after all, you could be missing out on the joke of the century.
BARRY HUMPHRIES

Humor Laughing Memorable
I’ve decided the secret of parenting is benevolent neglect.I put my family last. Because if you don’t, if you put them first, they never thank you. You’ll never get a word of thanks from them.
BARRY HUMPHRIES

First Lasts Secret
I think a lot of people think that we [comedians] are nerveless people in the theatre, that we don’t feel that kind of terror which traditionally anyone who has to do any public speaking feels. It’s worse for actors, because our livelihood depends on it.
BARRY HUMPHRIES

Comedian People Thinking
Friendship is tested in the thick years of success rather than in the thin years of struggle.
BARRY HUMPHRIES

Struggle Thick Years
It’s an old Aboriginal word meaning ‘Let’s get together and have fun’. They gave us the word because they had no further need for it.
BARRY HUMPHRIES

Fun Needs Together
I love Australia – I think.
BARRY HUMPHRIES

Country Emotion Love Thinking
New Zealand is a country of thirty thousand million sheep, three million of whom think they are human.
BARRY HUMPHRIES

Country Sheep Thinking

New Zealand is a country of thirty thousand million sheep, three million of whom think they are human.

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New Zealand is a country of thirty thousand million sheep, three million of whom think they are human.

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