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If I didn’t wake up I’d still be sleeping.

Yogi Berra

I don’t like seeing myself on television. I don’t like it.
YOGI BERRA

See Television
All pitchers are liars or crybabies.
YOGI BERRA

Baseball Liar
I always got nervous the nights we played in the World Series. First pitch, I was nervous. Then after that, forget it; I’d start playing.
YOGI BERRA

Baseball Nervous Series
50% of all married people are women.
YOGI BERRA

Funny Marriage One Liner People Women
Anyone who understands Jazz knows that you can’t understand it. It’s too complicated. That’s what’s so simple about it.
YOGI BERRA

Complicated Jazz Music Understand
If you’re going to cheat, it’s better if you don’t get caught.
YOGI BERRA

Baseball Cheat
If you ask me anything I don’t know, I’m not going to answer.
YOGI BERRA

Answer Atitude
Little things are big.
YOGI BERRA

Big Minimalism One Liner
So I’m ugly. So what? I never saw anyone hit with his face.
YOGI BERRA

Baseball Face Hit Ugly
That’s too coincidental to be a coincidence.
YOGI BERRA

Coincidence One Liner
I never blame myself when I’m not hitting. I just blame the bat and if it keeps up, I change bats. After all, if I know it isn’t my fault that I’m not hitting, how can I get mad at myself?
YOGI BERRA

Baseball Blame Hit Mad
In baseball, you don’t know nothing.
YOGI BERRA

Baseball Game Sports
Love is the most important thing in the world, but baseball is pretty good, too.
YOGI BERRA

Baseball Important Love Sports World
Laughter is the shock absorber that eases the blows of life.
YOGI BERRA

Laughter Life Shock
Half the lies they tell about me aren’t true.
YOGI BERRA

Lie Truth
Well, I used to look like this when I was young and now I still do.
YOGI BERRA

Funny Young

If I didn’t wake up I’d still be sleeping.

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If I didn’t wake up I’d still be sleeping.

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