“On the whole, with scandalous exceptions, Democracy has given the ordinary worker more dignity than he ever had.”

You’re so earnest about morality that I hate to think how essentially immoral you must be underneath.

I’ve heard of their curing syphilis by giving the patient malaria, but I’ve never heard of their curing malaria by giving the patient syphilis.

I love America, but I don’t like it.

Every compulsion is put upon writers to become safe, polite, obedient, and sterile.

He loved the people just as much as he feared and detested persons.

So much in a revolution is nothing but waiting.

Love is the one thing that can really sure-enough lighten all of life’s dark clouds.

We’re tired of hearing politicians and priests and cautious reformers… coax us, ‘Be calm! Be patient! Wait!

Is it possible that nobody has ever known that there never has been a completely civilized man, and won’t be for another thousand years?

My objection to the church isn’t that the preachers are cruel, hypocritical, actually wicked, though some of them are that, too .

We’d get sick on too many cookies, but ever so much sicker on no cookies at all.

The world and all its wisdom is but a booby, blundering school-boy that needs management and could be managed.

Why is it that traveling Americans are always so dreadful?

To be ‘intellectual’ or ‘artistic’ or, in their own word, to be ‘highbrow,’ is to be priggish and of dubious virtue.

A man takes a drink, the drink takes another, and the drink takes the man.

Most of us who work — or want to work — will always have trouble or discontent. So we must learn to be calm, and train all our faculties, and make others happy.

You can’t be an entrepreneur for other people. You can’t start a company for other people.

You have to love it more than you ever thought of loving something that wasn’t a human being. The demands will kick you down and rob your life – but yet, it is so rewarding.

I dislike religion quite intensely. It’s been the cause of all the grief in the world ever since they discovered the first stone to worship.

I ain’t ever had a job, I just always played baseball.

I’m fed up with the idiots… the ever-widening gap between people who know how to make movies and the people who green-light the movies.

The thing about death is it’s so final, isn’t it, really? As far as we know… Nobody has ever come back and told us about it.

No one has ever drowned in sweat.

I don’t think I’ll ever act again. I have so many wonderful memories, but those days are over.