Kuwait City is not gorgeous, actually, but it’s got a kind of Epcot Center thing going for it. It’s not pretty. But it’s striking, I’ll give it that. It’s not as over-the-top as Abu Dhabi or Dubai. But nearly.
P. J. O'ROURKEFamily love is messy, clinging, and of an annoying and repetitive pattern, like bad wallpaper.
More P. J. O'Rourke Quotes
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In its worse forms, conservatism is a matter of ‘I hate strangers and anything that’s different.’
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The beauty of democracy is that an average, random, unremarkable citizen can lead it.
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Every vote should carry a serial number, so that responsibility for harmful or careless use of the vote can be traced. Concealed voting should be outlawed.
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The whole idea of our government is this: If enough people get together and act in concert, they can take something and not pay for it.
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Government is a health hazard. Governments have killed many more people than cigarettes or unbuckled seat belts ever have.
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Barack Obama is more irritating than the other nuisances on the Left.
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If we heard that somebody starved to death in Sweden or Switzerland, we would be shocked.
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By the end of the 1950s, American cars were so reliable that their reliability went without saying even in car ads. Thousands of them bear testimony to this today, still running on the roads of Cuba though fueled with nationalized Venezuelan gasoline and maintained with spit and haywire.
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The importance of local governance may not be obvious to an America accustomed to treating city and state downfalls with doses of federal comeuppance. Sometimes there’s a reason for that – the Civil War. More often, all reasoning seems absent – No Child Left Behind.
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The problem in Afghanistan is really not so much land as water. It’s a dry country with ample amounts of water running through it, but not to good enough effect.
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Even very young children need to be informed about dying. Explain the concept of death very carefully to your child. This will make threatening him with it much more effective.
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Richard Nixon was the best thing that ever happened to journalism. I mean this guy was wonderful. Just when you thought he could get no worse, he got worse.
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Humans are the only animals that have children on purpose with the exception of guppies, who like to eat theirs.
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Everybody knows how to raise children, except the people who have them.
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I’ve got a 1990 Porsche 911. It’s just a Carrera, a very simple, straightforward little thing that goes like stink. I love it.
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If you ask the government to solve all of your problems, it’s a bit like asking your wife to cook and clean, to raise the children, to hold down a second job to help with the family finances, to keep her parents happy and well and keep your parents happy and well, and to also – to do the lawn and clean the gutters.
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Fiscal conservatism is just an easy way to express something that is a bit more difficult, which is that the size and scope of government, and really the size and scope of politics in our lives, has grown uncomfortable, unwieldy, intrusive and inefficient.
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Southern California is a nice place, if you could cut out the show-business cancer. It just keeps spreading.
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There isn’t much room for an outsider point of view in print any more.
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Feeling good about government is like looking on the bright side of any catastrophe. When you quit looking on the bright side, the catastrophe is still there.
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Wealth is not a pizza, where if I have too many slices you have to eat the Domino’s box.
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Seriousness is stupidity sent to college.
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The Democrats are the party that says government will make you smarter, taller, richer, and remove the crabgrass on your lawn. The Republicans are the party that says government doesn’t work and then they get elected and prove it.
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Little islands of human happiness, peace, and prosperity are so exceptional at this point in history that I’m not even sure we can draw lessons from them.
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Once you’ve built the big machinery of political power, remember you won’t always be the one to run it.
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I had always thought of Egypt as a rather secular country. And I think it is, but people are quite observant of the strictures of Ramadan.
P. J. O'ROURKE