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That’s not my world. My world has a cracked sidewalk.

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We rush for the stars as we crawl toward our graves.
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I had my moment on the stage. The trick in life is to know when to leave.
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The next time I will cry is when I die. My life has been that beautiful.
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I think everyone should go to college and get a degree and then spend six months as a bartender and six months as a cabdriver. Then they would really be educated.
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If the waitress has dirty ankles, the chili is good.
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Fifty percent of the doctors in this country graduated in the bottom half of their classes.
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All love affairs end. Eventually the girl is gonna put curlers in her hair.
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Remember, half the doctors in this country graduated in the bottom half of their class.
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You better have great practices.
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I’m not saying that they were Einsteins; they were marginal students. But every ballplayer whoever touched me has moved up his station in life. And the players moved up my station.
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Life is what you allow yourself not to see.
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It’s a profession in which, the longer you stay, the closer you are to being fired.
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Every obnoxious fan has a wife at home that dominates him.
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When I’m losing, they call me nuts. When I’m winning, they call me eccentric.
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Most people zero in on their failures. I try to keep all my attention on a pyramid type philosophy rather than the averaging-down philosophy.
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I don’t believe in looking past anybody – I wouldn’t look past the Little Sisters of the Poor after they stayed up all night.
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