My first car was a motorcycle.
ADAM CAROLLAIf in 1989 I said, ‘I have an idea: Bottle water and sell it. And charge more than a beer,’ they would have chased me around with a giant butterfly net. The same with paying to watch a television station.
More Adam Carolla Quotes
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It should be like a salmon taking to open water. I’ve done so much morning radio that I won’t be overwhelmed by it, but it’s still going to be a challenge.
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Asking someone in advance not judge you, is like asking someone in advance not to smell you.
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If birds were the size of a T-Rex, the streets would be littered with human remains.
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People are stupid. There’s a lot of dumb stuff that’s successful.
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You should feel good about yourself because of your accomplishments. Not because somebody yelled at you to feel good about yourself.
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We never pick up a brush and stand in front of our own easel.
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I don’t think I’ve ever seen pie advertised. That’s how you know it’s good. They advertise ice cream and other desserts.
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If the media isnt slanted toward the Left, why is everyone so worried about my affiliation with Glenn Beck but not with Alec Baldwin?
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When you’re doing a radio show, you can express yourself.
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There’s no bigger atheist than me. Well, I take that back. I’m a cancer screening away from going agnostic and a biopsy away from full-fledged Christian.
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I didn’t have any success in show business until I was 30 to 31 years of age.
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Chicks love dudes who are successful who happen to have money – do you know what I mean? Chicks are attracted to dudes that are doing their own thing.
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I like my parents but they are just not good parents. They are nice enough people. I’m not interested in hurting their feelings.
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Well, the post office is probably not the place you want to go if you want to be infused with patriotism and a renewed sense of vigor.
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Toss some Hungarian in every once in a while. You will not be sorry. Good, solid peasant food.
ADAM CAROLLA