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If you want a place in the sun, you have got to put up with a few blisters.

Abigail Van Buren

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Many husbands today pitch in to help with household chores – it’s called partnership.
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If you want your children to turn out well, spend twice as much time with them, and half as much money.
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Religion, like water, may be free, but when they pipe it to you, you’ve got to help pay for the piping. And the piper.
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If we could sell our experiences for what they cost us, we’d all be millionaires.
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Cruel words erode the self-esteem like the ocean eats away the shore.
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Maturity is the ability to do a job whether you’re supervised or not; finish a job once it’s started; carry money without spending it; and the ability to bear an injustice without wanting to get even.
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Women who miscalculate are called mothers.
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Never advise anyone to go to war or to get married.
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Kissing power is stronger than will power: Girls need to “prove their love” like a moose needs a hat rack.
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If you want a place in the sun, you have got to put up with a few blisters.
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Psychotherapy, unlike castor oil, which will work no matter how you get it down, is useless when forced on an uncooperative patient.
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A church is a hospital for sinners, not a museum for saints.
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It is true that I was born in Iowa, but I can’t speak for my twin sister.
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Kids grow up awfully fast these days,”she said. “You should try to have a good relationship with your kids, no matter what they do.
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The purpose of life is to amount to something and have it make some difference that you lived at all.
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