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When I was 11 my friend’s mom made a peanut butter sandwich. I ate the sandwich and was like, ‘I’m never eating anything else again.’ And I still eat peanut butter every day. I would put peanut butter on a steak.

Aasif Mandvi

North Carolina precinct chairman and GOP executive committee member Don Yelton thinks his state’s new voting restrictions are just fine.
AASIF MANDVI

Carolina Definitely Don Member North Restriction State Thinking Voting Yelton
It is ironic that it doesn’t matter how successful I am in any other capacity. Ultimately, my parents marker is do you have a wife? And do you have children?
AASIF MANDVI

Children Iconic Marker Successful Wife
I’m Muslim the way many of my Jewish friends are Jewish: I avoid pork, and I take the big holidays off.
AASIF MANDVI

Big Friend Holiday Jewish Muslim Off Pork Way
So I had this completely unrealistic idea of what America was — but I wanted to be there.
AASIF MANDVI

America Complete Idea Unrealistic Wanted
In America, people think being South Asian is still kind of exotic. When you go outside New York and Chicago and L.A., there are people who have never tried Indian food… they’ve never even tasted it!
AASIF MANDVI

America Chicago Country Exotic New York Outside People Thinking
This was in the ’70s and there was a lot of racism towards South Asians and there was a lot of hazing and bullying and racism that really probably shaped me in some way in terms of, like, wanting to get out of there.
AASIF MANDVI

Asian Bullying Hazing Racism South Toward Way
Statistically there is enough voter fraud to sway zero elections.
AASIF MANDVI

Election Statistically Voter Voter Fraud Zero
Indian culture is essentially much more of a we culture. It’s a communal culture where you do what’s best for the community – you procreate.
AASIF MANDVI

Community Culture Essential Indian
You can get samosas in any pub in England today, pretty much. So, “Gunga Din” has come back.
AASIF MANDVI

Back Come England Pub Samosa Today
I think you had the GOP down there in North Carolina reaching out to African-American voters and this guy coming on television and using the N-word and saying what Don Yelton said.
AASIF MANDVI

African American Coming Guy Television Thinking
The great joy of doing ‘The Daily Show’ for me is that I get to sit on the fence between cultures. I am commenting on the absurdity of both sides as an outsider and insider. Sometimes I’m playing the brown guy, and sometimes I’m not, but the best stuff I do always goes back to being a brown kid in a white world.
AASIF MANDVI

Commenting Culture Great Guy Kids White
I’m not really a food connoisseur.
AASIF MANDVI

Connoisseur Food Really
I think politicians and comedians have a lot in common. One is a group of approval-seeking narcissists who will say and do anything to be liked… and comedians are always talking about politics.
AASIF MANDVI

Approval Comedian Common Grop Politician Seeking Talking Thinking
I’ve always said I’m the worst representative of Muslim-Americans that’s ever existed, because I’ve been inside more bars than mosques.
AASIF MANDVI

Bar Existed Inside More Mosque Muslim
I thought [when I was 16] my days were just going to be spent hanging out on a beach and my girlfriend was going to be Miss Teen USA and my best friend will be a dolphin.
AASIF MANDVI

Beach Day Enjoy Girlfriend Hanging Spent
Of course the law’s not racist.
AASIF MANDVI

Course Law Racist Result

When I was 11 my friend’s mom made a peanut butter sandwich. I ate the sandwich and was like, ‘I’m never eating anything else again.’ And I still eat peanut butter every day. I would put peanut butter on a steak.

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When I was 11 my friend’s mom made a peanut butter sandwich. I ate the sandwich and was like, ‘I’m never eating anything else again.’ And I still eat peanut butter every day. I would put peanut butter on a steak.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

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