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I applied to Uncyclopedia Bassists, and was accepted!!

Eddie Van Halen

I’m not a drunk anymore, but since they cut out my tongue, I sound drunk.
EDDIE VAN HALEN

Drink Myself Sound
It’s always a Catch-22 situation. They hate you if you’re the same, and they hate you if you’re different.
EDDIE VAN HALEN

Different Hate Situation Yourself
I applied to Uncyclopedia Bassists, and was accepted!!
EDDIE VAN HALEN

Acceptance Application Myself
I’m the one in the band that said I’m not going on tour unless we do a record.
EDDIE VAN HALEN

Myself Oneself Person Record Tour Voice
I’ll be making music ’til the day I die. I’ve done all kinds of stuff, and more is coming.
EDDIE VAN HALEN

Day Death Kind Music Myself
Eventually you’ll take the phrases and rhythm patterns you’ve copped and begin to put your own mark on them.
EDDIE VAN HALEN

Beginning Mark Pattern Rhythm Yourself
Practice. I used to sit on the edge of my bed with a six-pack of Tuborg. My brother would go out to party and get laid, come home at 3am., and I would still be playing with myself.
EDDIE VAN HALEN

Bed Brother Dedication Music Myself Practice
Cancer is like a cockroach. It just comes back stronger. I’m tearing apart the immune system of the cockroach and seeing how it ticks. I’ve opened up my own pathology center.
EDDIE VAN HALEN

Cancer Hospital Immunity Myself Open Strong System
I just consider myself slightly left-of-center. I’m not your average bear. I – what’s the word? I’m not – normal.
EDDIE VAN HALEN

Average Myself Normal Ordinary Word
The one thing I do have is good ears. I don’t mean perfect pitch, but ears for picking things up. I developed my ear through piano theory, but I never had a guitar lesson in my life, except from Eric Clapton off of records.
EDDIE VAN HALEN

Development Goodness Myself Perfection Record Theory
Rock stars come and go. Musicians play until they die.
EDDIE VAN HALEN

Death Musician Rock Stardom
When Van Halen started out, there was no path to fame. We just played what we liked. Even today it always comes down to the simplicity of rock and roll.
EDDIE VAN HALEN

Fame Music Path Simplicity Start
I never took guitar lessons. I took classical piano lessons from the age of six when we lived in Holland.
EDDIE VAN HALEN

Age Guitar Lesson Live Myself
A good producer brings out the best in the artist he’s working with. You shouldn’t be able to listen to something and say, ‘So-and-so produced this album.
EDDIE VAN HALEN

Album Artist Best Goodness Listening Production
It makes me feel kind of weird, but obviously the Man Upstairs gave me something and it touches people, and I’m just so blessed.
EDDIE VAN HALEN

Blessing Feeling Kind Man Myself People Touch Weird
Best believe that needle hurt you Best to see these true colors Than follow one of your false virtues A little secret to make you think: Why is the crazy stuff we never say, poetry in ink?
EDDIE VAN HALEN

Believe Color Ink Poetry Secret Thinking True

I applied to Uncyclopedia Bassists, and was accepted!!

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I applied to Uncyclopedia Bassists, and was accepted!!

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