“A person without a sense of humor is like a wagon without springs. It’s jolted by every pebble on the road.”

It’s easier to go down a hill than up it but the view is much better at the top.

Interest works night and day in fair weather and in foul. It gnaws at a man’s substance with invisible teeth.

He is rich or poor according to what he is, not according to what he has.

Involved sentences, crooked, circuitous, and parenthetical, no matter how musically they may be balanced, are prejudicial to a facile understanding of the truth.

To know that one has a secret is to know half the secret itself.

Well married a person has wings, poorly married shackles.

To become an able and successful man in any profession, three things are necessary, nature, study and practice.

To do good work a man should no doubt be industrious. To do great work he must certainly be idle a well.

All men are tempted. There is no man that lives that can’t be broken down, provided it is the right temptation, put in the right spot.

That is true culture which helps us to work for the social betterment of all.

If a man harbors any sort of fear, it percolates through all his thinking, damages his personality, makes him landlord to a ghost.

The first hour of the morning is the rudder of the day.

Beauty may be said to be God’s trademark in creation.

To the great tree-loving fraternity we belong. We love trees with universal and unfeigned love, and all things that do grow under them or around them – the whole leaf and root tribe.

God sends experience to paint men’s portraits.

I never knew an early-rising, hard-working, prudent man, careful of his earnings, and strictly honest who complained of bad luck.

When you put Listerine in your mouth, it hurts. Germs do not go quietly.

Imagine if you were a drummer, and you accidentally picked up two magic wands instead of sticks. There you are, keeping the beat, the next thing you know, your bass player turns into a can of soup.

I sometimes wish that people would put a little more emphasis upon the observance of the law than they do upon its enforcement.

My sense of humor will always stand in the way of my seeing myself, my family, my race or my nation as the whole intent of the universe.

Humor is also a way of saying something serious.

People with a sense of humor tend to be less egocentric and more realistic in their view of the world and more humble in moments of success and less defeated in times of travail.

You can turn painful situations around through laughter. If you can find humor in anything, even poverty, you can survive it.

There are two theories to arguing with a woman. Neither works.