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I think we live in an age of increasing mediocrity.

Dick Cavett

Every time I nostalgically try to regain my liking of John McCain, he reaches into his sleaze bag and pulls out something malodorous.
DICK CAVETT

Food Myself Reach Time
I did standup while still working for Johnny Carson in the mid-’60s, thus gaining the advantage of at least getting laughs from him about how I hadn’t the night before.
DICK CAVETT

Advantage Laughter Myself Night Stand Work
Does anything show the complexity of the miraculous brain more than that weird curiosity, the sleep-protection dream?
DICK CAVETT

Complex Curiosity Dreams Protection Weird
If your parents never had children, chances are neither will you.
DICK CAVETT

Children Parents Yourself
When I’m doing an appearance somewhere and taking questions from the audience, I can always count on: ‘Tell about the guy who died on your show!’
DICK CAVETT

Appearance Count Death Show Talk Yourself
Being the offspring of English teachers is a mixed blessing. When the film star says to you, on the air, ‘It was a perfect script for she and I,’ inside your head you hear, in the sarcastic voice of your late father, ‘Perfect for she, eh? And perfect for I, also?’
DICK CAVETT

Blessing Head Movie Myself Perfection Teacher
Great humorists are great insulters.
DICK CAVETT

Great Humor Insult
To call New York’s traffic at holiday time a nightmare is to understate.
DICK CAVETT

Holiday Night Time Traffic
Every time someone says, ‘You know, we really ought to get together,’ if I were really honest, I would ask ‘Why?’
DICK CAVETT

Honesty Myself Time Togetherness
Its fun for me to go on other folks talk shows. When youve endured the ups and downs and tensions and pitfalls of hosting, being a guest is a piece of angel food.
DICK CAVETT

Angel Down Food Fun Pieces Show Talk Tension
Perhaps the saddest irony of depression is that suicide happens when the patient gets a little better and can again function sufficiently.
DICK CAVETT

Better Depression Function Patience Sadness Suicide
In relative youth, we assume we’ll remember everything. Someone should urge the young to think otherwise.
DICK CAVETT

Relative Remember Thinking Youth
It’s no fun being a specimen.
DICK CAVETT

Fun One Liner Specimen
Every comic can report a few ‘gift from the gods’ moments.
DICK CAVETT

Comic Gift God Moments Report
I have never been converted to or even had much interest in spiritualism, occultism, Swedenborgianism or any particular religion. And I never, except occasionally for a laugh, visit the quacks who call themselves psychics.
DICK CAVETT

Call Exception Interest Laughter Myself Religion
I hate Danny Kaye movies.
DICK CAVETT

Hate Movie Myself

I think we live in an age of increasing mediocrity.

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I think we live in an age of increasing mediocrity.

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