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Would a real man get caught eating a twinkie?

Andy Rooney

Do I have opinions that might piss people off? Yes – that’s what I’m here for.
ANDY ROONEY

Myself Opinion People
I’ve learned that we should be glad God doesn’t give us everything we ask for.
ANDY ROONEY

God Happiness Learning Myself
All of us talk faster than we listen.
ANDY ROONEY

Fast Listening Ourselves Talk
I’ve learned, That to ignore the facts does not change the facts.
ANDY ROONEY

Change Fact Ignorance Learning Myself
Computers make it easier to do a lot of things, but most of the things they make it easier to do don’t need to be done.
ANDY ROONEY

Computer Easy Need Work
When those waiters ask me if I want some fresh ground pepper, I ask if they have any aged pepper.
ANDY ROONEY

Age Fresh Myself Wait
The third rule of life is this: Everything you buy today is smaller, more expensive, and not as good as it was yesterday.
ANDY ROONEY

Expensive Goodness Rule Small Yourself
I’d like to be rich enough so I could throw soap away after the letters are worn off.
ANDY ROONEY

Enough Funny Letter Money Myself Rich
Don’t keep saying, “I don’t know where the time goes.” It goes the same place it’s always gone and no one has ever known where that is.
ANDY ROONEY

Place Time Unknown
I’ve learned. That when you plan to get even with someone, you are only letting that person continue to hurt you more.
ANDY ROONEY

Hurt Learning Person Planning Yourself
I’ve learned that under everyone’s hard shell is someone who wants to be appreciated and loved.
ANDY ROONEY

Appreciation Hard Learning Love
Death is a distant rumor to the young.
ANDY ROONEY

Death Distant One Liner Young
Women realize it’s not worth buying an entire pig just to get a little sausage!
ANDY ROONEY

Buy Food Realization Woman Worth
Sooner or later the world will have to return to the good old days when we fought wars and killed people the old-fashioned way, one at a time.
ANDY ROONEY

Goodness Kill Old Oneself People Return Time World
The great virtue of being alone is that your mind can go its own way.
ANDY ROONEY

Greatness Mindset Virtue Way
Looking and not finding is certainly one of the most frustrating ways to spend time.
ANDY ROONEY

Certain Finding Frustration Time

Would a real man get caught eating a twinkie?

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Would a real man get caught eating a twinkie?

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