“If dogs could talk it would take a lot of the fun out of owning one.”

I’ve learned, That you should never say no to a gift from a child.

I’ve learned That having a child fall asleep in your arms is one of the most peaceful feelings in the world.

I’ve learned that everyone you meet deserves to be greeted with a smile.

I’d like to be rich enough so I could throw soap away after the letters are worn off.

Go to bed. Whatever you’re staying up late for isn’t worth it.

Familiar things are a comfort to us all.

The two biggest sellers in any bookstore are the cookbooks and the diet books. The cookbooks tell you how to prepare the food, and the diet books tell you how not to eat any of it!

The third rule of life is this: Everything you buy today is smaller, more expensive, and not as good as it was yesterday.

I’ve learned that no one is perfect until you fall in love with them.

Death is a distant rumor to the young.

I’ve learned… That sometimes all a person needs is a hand to hold and a heart to understand.

I don’t know anything offhand that mystifies Americans more than the cotton they put in pill bottles. Why do they do it? Are you supposed to put the cotton back in once you’ve taken a pill out?

Being kind is more important than being right.

Guns do not make you a killer. I think killing makes you a killer. You can kill someone with a baseball bat or a car, but no one is trying to ban you from driving to the ball game.

Anyone who watches golf on television would enjoy watching the grass grow on the greens.

I’ve learned, That to ignore the facts does not change the facts.

Some men like a dull life – they like the routine of eating breakfast, going to work, coming home, petting the dog, watching TV, kissing the kids, and going to bed. Stay clear of it – it’s often catching.

I may not have been wearing a mink coat, but I was traveling with a dog. That should have made you think I was an actress!

Man’s nature is made up of four elements, which produce in him four attributes, namely, the beastly, the brutal, the satanic, and the divine. In man there is something of the pig, the dog, the devil, and the saint.

Recollect that the Almighty, who gave the dog to be companion of our pleasures and our toils, hath invested him with a nature noble and incapable of deceit.

I love dogs, not chimps. Some chimps are nice, and some are horrid. I don’t actually think of them as animals any more than I think of us as animals, although both of us are.

The misery of keeping a dog is his dying so soon. But, to be sure, if he lived for fifty years and then died, what would become of me?

He who does not understand that a dead lion is more alive than a living dog will remain a dog.

Pets reflect you like mirrors. When you are happy, you can see your dog smiling and when you are sad, your cat cries.