Mama had an appreciation of the language. She taught me a love of words, of how they should be used and how they can fill a creative soul with a passion and lead to a life’s work.
LEWIS GRIZZARDI’d much rather sit next to a smoker in a restaurant than a nose-blower.
More Lewis Grizzard Quotes
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There’s nothing inherently dirty about sex, but if you try real hard and use your imagination you can overcome that.
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Kinky sex involves the use of duck feathers. Perverted sex involves the whole duck.
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They tore out my heart and stomped that sucker flat.
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When My Love Returns from the Ladies Room, Will I Be Too Old to Care?
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I know lots of people who are educated far beyond their intelligence.
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There’s no such thing as being too Southern.
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Today’s sensitive male has learned to share in open frank discussions about relationships like, “Where the hell did you get a crazy idea like that? You been reading Redbook again?”
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I grew up in a very large family in a very small house. I never slept alone until after I was married.
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Money doesn’t grow on trees, and if it did somebody else would own the orchard.
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Baptists never make love standing up. They’re afraid someone might see them and think they’re dancing.
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Yankees don’t understand that the Southern way of talking is a language of nuance. What we can do in the South is we can take a word and change it just a little bit and make it mean something altogether different.
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Elvis is dead and I don’t feel so good for myself.
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You call to a dog and a dog will break its neck to get to you. Dogs just want to please. Call to a cat and its attitude is, ‘What’s in it for me?’
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Spring time is the land awakening.
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Sex hasn’t been the same since women started enjoying it.
LEWIS GRIZZARD