Patience, n. A minor form of dispair, disguised as a virtue.
AMBROSE BIERCEKnowledge is the small part of ignorance that we arrange and classify.
More Ambrose Bierce Quotes
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You don’t have to be stupid to be a Christian, but it probably helps.
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Forgetfulness – a gift of God bestowed upon debtors in compensation for their destitution of conscience.
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ULTIMATUM, n. In diplomacy, a last demand before resorting to concessions.
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Future. That period of time in which our affairs prosper, our friends are true and our happiness is assured.
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Don’t steal; thou’lt never thus compete successfully in business. Cheat.
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Year: A period of three hundred and sixty-five disappointments.
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Love: A temporary insanity curable by marriage.
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Knowledge is the small part of ignorance that we arrange and classify.
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Mausoleum, n: the final and funniest folly of the rich.
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Democracy is four wolves and a lamb voting on what to have for lunch.
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Eulogy. Praise of a person who has either the advantages of wealth and power, or the consideration to be dead.
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Patriotism. Combustible rubbish ready to the torch of any one ambitious to illuminate his name.
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Philosophy: A route of many roads leading from nowhere to nothing.
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Responsibility, n. A detachable burden easily shifted to the shoulders of God, Fate, Fortune, Luck or one’s neighbor. In the days of astrology it was customary to unload it upon a star.
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War is God’s way of teaching Americans geography.
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