Debt, n. An ingenious substitute for the chain and whip of the slavedriver.
AMBROSE BIERCEDon’t steal; thou’lt never thus compete successfully in business. Cheat.
More Ambrose Bierce Quotes
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History is an account, mostly false, of events, mostly unimportant, which are brought about by rulers, mostly knaves, and soldiers, mostly fools.
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Eulogy. Praise of a person who has either the advantages of wealth and power, or the consideration to be dead.
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A wedding is a ceremony at which two persons undertake to become one, one undertakes to become nothing, and nothing undertakes to become supportable.
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PAIN, n. An uncomfortable frame of mind that may have a physical basis in something that is being done to the body, or may be purely mental, caused by the good fortune of another.
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All are lunatics, but he who can analyze his delusions is called a philosopher.
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Vote: the instrument and symbol of a freeman’s power to make a fool of himself and a wreck of his country.
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Opposition, n. In politics the party that prevents the government from running amuck by hamstringing it.
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ARMOR, n. The kind of clothing worn by a man whose tailor is a blacksmith.
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The most affectionate creature in the world is a wet dog.
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ULTIMATUM, n. In diplomacy, a last demand before resorting to concessions.
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April fool, n. The March fool with another month added to his folly.
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Prescription: A physician’s guess at what will best prolong the situation with least harm to the patient.
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Death is not the end. There remains the litigation over the estate.
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There is nothing new under the sun but there are lots of old things we don’t know.
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Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math.
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